


stop the world ‘cause i wanna get off with you

by antiopesgirlfriend



Category: Doctor Who (2005)
Genre: AU, F/F, thasmin
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-09
Updated: 2019-03-25
Packaged: 2019-10-07 11:38:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 18
Words: 26,531
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17365229
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/antiopesgirlfriend/pseuds/antiopesgirlfriend
Summary: yaz’s favourite bookshop is taken over by an eccentric blonde. she joins the new book club and finds herself captivated by everything the new owner says and does.





	1. the pickle

**Author's Note:**

> title from the arctic monkey's song of the same title. thought it might be fitting to use a sheff band for a fic based in sheff :D
> 
> ps. if there are any typos or formatting mistakes, you have my apologies. i had to write this on my phone bc i got an electric shock from my laptop charger and now the charger doesn't work :/ but a new one is in the post ! :D
> 
> i hope it's okay <3

Yaz is in a bit of a pickle. She loves to read. Her love of reading was awoken by a bookshop a mere ten minutes from her childhood home. It was a cosy place - it sometimes felt more like home than her parents’ flat at Park Hill. When she was younger, she would use her money to buy one book a week. Often, this would not be enough. It wasn’t rare for nine-year-old Yaz to buy a book on Saturday morning and return for another on the evening of the Sunday. Then there was the rest of the week. It was becoming an expensive hobby. Her mother and father tried to convince her to join a library, but their daughter was stubborn.

‘It’s just not the same!’ she would huff, marching with a book under her arm to hide in her room for the rest of the evening.

The owners of the book shop - Mrs and Mrs Porter (later known to Yaz as Helly and Sarah) - took a shine to Yaz very quickly. She was a sweet child, though would arrive at the bookshop rather subdued after school. The Porters feared she did not have the best school life. But, after a hot chocolate and a biscuit, little Yaz began to perk up and would soon begin reading with a smile on her lips. She was a pleasure to have in the shop. At a point the Porters could not identify, they began to see her as the daughter they could never have. Obviously, they knew Yaz had her own parents at home, but they still liked to treat her. Once or twice a month, they would give her a book for free. Yaz even had her own desk she could do her homework at. As she grew older, it became her favourite place to study. It was there that she earned her GCSE grades then later worked to pass her police entrance exams.

The Porters were unbelievably proud of Yaz and felt honoured that she had stayed with them for so long. Yaz was the thing that made it hardest to say goodbye. Their family needed them. And so, they had shared the teary news with Yaz - they were having to pack up and move back to Newcastle.

Yaz had been distraught. So many of her childhood memories belonged in their bookshop. Not to mention, they’d been her mentors. She’d affectionately dubbed them her ‘adopted lesbian mothers’, though the Porters would never know of it. They had helped her through the hardships of being bullied in primary school and guided her through the obstacles which arose when she realised she liked girls. Helly and Sarah had been there to prove that it was possible to grow old with the woman you loved even if you were also a woman. They held her hand through her first crush on a girl, her first relationship, her first heartbreak. And now they were gone. Of course, Yaz could write to them or call them whenever she needed to - they had assured her of this - but it still felt like a part of her heart had been ripped out and taken to Newcastle with the Porters.

The Porters had sold the bookshop and handed it over to someone they thought would treat it well. It was now owned by an eccentric blonde lady. She had re-hired the two attendants previously employed by the Porters, so that was a good start in Yaz’s eyes.

This is where Yaz’s pickle originates. There is a new owner of the bookshop. Yaz wants to see what it’s like in its new hands, but feels she is betraying Helly and Sarah by doing so. Eventually, she tells herself this is nonsense and works up the courage to visit.

When Yaz steps inside, it’s almost as if nothing has changed. The bookshelves still tower over her, the layout the same. There is still the overwhelming scent of new books the moment you step into the building, though there is now an added undertone of coffee.

Ryan and Graham - the previous attendants - greet Yaz with a hug as she steps through the door.

“It’s good to have you back.” Says Ryan.

“Yeah, we didn’t know if we’d see you again once the Porters had left.” Adds Graham.

Yaz feels a prickle in her nose as she fights off the tears that threaten to form in her eyes. She offers them a sad smile. “Thought I’d come and see the old place.”

Graham offers a kind smile in return. “If it helps, I think you’ll like her. The new owner, I mean.”

“Yeah?” Says Yaz.

“Yeah.” Ryan confirms. “She’s definitely your type.” His words earn him an elbow in the ribs from Graham.

Slowly, Yaz makes her way through the aisles, letting the tips of her fingers glide along the familiar shelves. When she reaches the payment desk, there isn’t a single speck of dust on her fingers. She is glad to find the shop is still well-kept. In her hand, Yaz holds a copy of Annie On My Mind. As she waits patiently to pay, she notes the new coffee machine against the wall opposite.

In no time at all, the new owner bumbles out of the back at into Yaz’s eye-line. “Hiya!” She says brightly, stepping behind the desk. “What can I do for you?”

“I’d like to buy this, please.” Says Yaz, uncharacteristically shyly, sliding the book towards the blonde.

“Brilliant book!” Says the blonde. “Have you read it before?”

Yaz nods, unable to find words. As the blonde babbles on about her love for the book, Yaz takes the time to take in the new owner. She is friendly - Yaz has no qualms about saying so. There is also a twinkle in her eye that cannot be ignored. She is captivating. Yaz listens contentedly to each word, her northern accent making Yaz feel at home. Her animated face is framed by loose blonde curls. It pains Yaz to admit it, but Ryan was right. The new owner is exactly her type.

“We’re starting up a book club.” Says the blonde, pointing to a poster advertising it on the desk. “The first book is _The Long Way to a Small, Angry Planet_ by Becky Chambers. First meeting is on Tuesday at half past six if you’re interested.”

“Yeah, I’ll come along.” Says Yaz, having found her voice. “Do I need to have read it by then?”

The new owner shakes her head furiously. “Not at all! We’ll introduce the book, and ourselves, at the first meeting. Speaking of, what’s your name?”

“Yasmin.” Says Yaz. She nods in the general direction of Ryan and Graham. “But my friends call me Yaz. And your name?”

“I’m Joanna.” The blonde smiles, a cheeky glint in her eye. “But my friends call me Jo.”

They bid their farewells, and Yaz leaves the bookshop, her new book tucked under her arm. She hopes it won’t be long until she can call the new owner Jo.

Yaz makes a mental note to call Helly and Sarah when she gets home to let them know she approves of the new owner.


	2. a woman after my own heart

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> before we start, can i just say thank you to everyone who left kudos/comments last chapter. i was overwhelmed by the reception so thank you <3
> 
> also ~ a huge thank you to @manyfandomed on tumblr for being an increds beta <3

It is the day of the first meeting of the book club. Yaz’s stomach is in her throat. She has no idea what to expect and it is made worse by the fact that she will be seeing Jo, the woman she likes again. Although, after talking to Helly and Sarah, she is a little calmer, her ‘adopted lesbian mothers’ settling her nerves. They think Yaz and Jo will get on swimmingly, and if Yaz finds herself attracted to her, she has their full, unwavering support. This is relieving for Yaz. She is well aware of her attraction to the blonde, and she has a sneaking suspicion the feeling will only grow with time.

Besides her nerves, Yaz is excited. Yaz had looked up the book and was amazed it hadn’t already made its way onto her bookshelf; her hands yearn to flip through the pages.

There is something strange about arriving at the bookshop Yaz knows so well while being filled with an entirely different sense of excitement and apprehension than before. Opening the doors, she is surprised to see there was no-one else in there for the book club. She knew that Graham and Ryan wouldn’t be present as their hours dd not cover the book club. However, other than them, she was expecting to walk into a small circle of people already partaking in polite discussion. Yaz is a little late. She’d had to close up a case and the traffic since leaving Snig Hill  Police Station had been abysmal. 

“Sorry I’m late.” Yaz says. “The universe didn’t seem to be on my side this afternoon.”

“It’s no bother!” Dismisses Jo. “I’m just glad you’re here.”

Yaz catches the relief in Jo’s voice. She can see Jo was beginning to worry that no-one would turn up to her club. “I wouldn’t miss it for the world.” Yaz hopes it’s enough to put the woman’s worries at bay.

It seems to be. “Take a seat.” Jo says. “Can I get you a drink, Yaz? I’m going to have a hot chocolate.”

Yaz sits in a comfortable armchair but is taken aback for a moment. Firstly, because Jo had remembered her name. Graham and Ryan had both boasted to her about how busy the shop had been. If Jo had remembered her name after so many people had passed through, she must be a whiz at names, Yaz reasons trying to stop that ember of hope flaring too much. Secondly, because she had called her Yaz instead of Yasmin - a name reserved for her friends only. It had sounded nice falling from Jo’s lips, however, so Yaz doesn’t mind. “I’ll have a hot chocolate too, please, Jo.”

Jo grins. “Whipped cream and marshmallows?”

“Just whipped cream please.”

“A woman after my own heart.” Jo sighs wistfully, squirting a mountain of cream on top of the first hot chocolate made.

When Jo passes the drink to Yaz, Yaz hopes the blush caused by Jo’s words is not noticeable on her cheeks. If it is, Jo says nothing about it.

“Have you got a copy of the book already?” Jo asks, a trace of whipped cream on the end of her nose.

“I was hoping I could buy one here.” Says Yaz.

“I was hoping that’s what you would say!” Responds Jo, springing to her feet to collect a copy.

“Uhh…” Yaz stammers. “You have something…” She lets her finger point to her nose.

Jo mirrors her action and scrunches up her face when her fingertips graze something wet. Frows burrowed, she moves her hand so she can see the offending substance. “Cream!” She exclaims, and happily licks it off her fingers. Once she is satisfied it is all gone, she washes her hands and hands the book over to Yaz.

“How much is it?”

“A fiver.” Says Jo. “Consider it a book club discount!” She winks.

Yaz blushes once more, unable to stop the flow of blood to her cheeks. “Thank you.” She mumbles, passing over the blue note.

“Thank  _ you. _ ” Says Jo, putting the crip note into the cash register before settling down in the armchair opposite Yaz. “Shall we begin?”

“No time like the present.”

And so, Jo launches into an enthusiastic spiel about the book they are due to read. Apparently, it is a feel-good science-fiction novel with great characters - strong females and diversity in abundance - and has strong anti-prejudice themes throughout.

They decide they will read the first few chapters in each others’ company to get a feel for the book before they meet in two weeks’ time to discuss the whole thing.

Yaz is a quick reader. It is partly due to genetics and also from the sheer amount of time she spent reading as a child. Therefore, she finishes reading the parts they’d agreed on a fair while before Jo does. This surprises Yaz a little as she thought the owner of a bookshop would have been a faster reader. However, when she looks over to Jo, she can see why it is taking her so much longer. Each word is mouthed as her eyes run across the page, her face shifting and shaping as she learns new information. It is mesmerising, and Yaz finds herself taking in every inch of her face. A new world to explore in the creases of her skin that she wants to delve into just as much, if not more, than the book currently in her hands.

Realising that she is staring, Yaz’s eyes snap down to her book which she closes and places on the table in front of her.

Jo notices the movement in her peripheral vision and she too moves to put her book down.

“No.” Says Yaz. “Keep reading. Don’t mind me.”

Jo offers her a gentle smile and carries on from where she had left off. Once more, her mouth forms the words she reads, engrossed in the book’s happenings as if she hadn’t been distracted just seconds ago.

Once Jo reaches the same point as Yaz, she closes her book with a loud clap of the pages and throws it onto the table. “I like that.” She says, a grin splitting from ear to ear.

“Me too.” Says Yaz, though try as she might, she cannot muster the same enthusiasm Jo exuberates.

“Apt as well.” Continues Jo. “The potential for all sorts of new friendships.”

“The  _ start  _ of new friendships.” Yaz supplies.

“Yes.” Says Jo thoughtfully, a softer smile playing on her lips. “I like that.”

“The new start is relevant too.”

“Oh, indeed.” Agrees Jo. “Finding my way around a new city is very much comparable to Rosemary’s learning about a foreign ship. Added to that, I can’t afford to mess up in my job, either. Perks of being your own boss.” She forces a laugh.

“I’m sure you’ll do just fine.” Says Yaz. “You’ll pick it up soon enough. Ryan and Graham can teach you the tricks of the trade too. They’ve been here long enough.”

“Have you been coming here a while, then?” Jo asks.

“For as long as I can remember.” Yaz answers. “The Porters were like family to me.”

Realisation passes like a breaking wave over Jo’s face. She can remember Helly and Sarah telling her of their favourite customer. “I hope you feel just as welcome now I’m here.”

“I do.” Yaz replies genuinely. But she doesn’t cope well with lingering emotions, especially when they weigh upon her as heavily as Helly and Sarah’s recent departure. So like most people would, Yaz quickly changes the subject. “So, do you think aliens exist?”

Jo’s eyes widen as if she’s been waiting to be asked that question her whole life. “Yes! Of course. The universe is so wide, so vast, so endless. We’ve barely explored a fraction of it. We can’t be the only ones out here!”

“Oh, definitely.” Says Yaz. “There’s so much out there, I don’t think we’ll ever know everything in the universe. But there have to be aliens out there somewhere. Even if they don’t look how we expect them to.”

“I think we’re going to be really good friends.” Says Jo seriously.

“I’d like that.” Yaz bites her lip as she smiles. She doesn’t miss Jo’s eyes flicking between her eyes and lips.

  
After a while longer discussing  _ The Long Way to a Small, Angry Planet _ \- what they think of the characters and what might happen to who - Yaz and Jo go their separate ways, both hoping to see the other before their next book club meeting in a fortnight’s time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you for reading !! i hope you enjoyed this instalment :) if you haven't read the long way to a small, angry planet, i would 100% advise you too. it is so flipping good.
> 
> feel free to message me on tumblr abt this fic/the books mentioned/thasmin in general bc i am always up for a chat <3 @antiopesgirlfriend


	3. never been so relieved to see a lidl in all of her life

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> okay so clearly this fic has no update schedule lmao i just upload whenever. but it is all planned out ! and i have two more chapters handwritten so im not gonna abandon this fic, do not worry <3
> 
> again, thanks to @manyfandomed for being an amazing beta <3

On the day of the second book club meeting, Yaz finds work creeps by agonisingly slowly. She has finished the book and is eager to discuss its contents with Jo. She is also just as eager to see Jo. It hasn’t quite been two weeks since she saw her last - Yaz has been finding excuses to visit the bookshop whenever she can.

Upon her entrance to the bookshop at half past six on the dot this time, she is swarmed by Ryan and Graham. 

“Fancy seeing you here!” Says Graham. He has always been a bad liar. Not that Ryan is any better.

Yaz narrows her eyes at the two of them. “It’s the book club and you know that I come to it.”

“Well, yes, but…” Graham falters.

“We didn’t notice the time.” Ryan fills in. There is an airiness to his tone which reeks of faux-nonchalance.

“Sure you didn’t.” Says Yaz. She knows the two well - particularly Ryan. They went to primary school together. Even then, when the teacher dismissed their class, he was always the first out of the door. This had not changed since transitioning to working life. “Well, if you’re heading out, I’ll see you in a bit?” The truth is, Yaz doesn’t want them hanging around. They are nosy, as proved by their waiting for Yaz to arrive. Ryan is always trying to find out the secrets of her love life. Yaz doesn’t want to give him any reason to start digging. Thankfully, neither him nor Graham are the most observant, and so Yaz has faith they won’t notice the little bit of makeup she’d put on before leaving work, or that she’d changed out of her police uniform and into a pair of skinny jeans and a nice shirt.

Ryan and Graham shuffle past Yaz to leave begrudgingly. Just before closing the door behind them, Graham turns back to Yaz. “Hope you have a nice evening.” He says.

“I’m sure she will do, Gramps.” Says Ryan, his smirk a warning sign to Yaz for the words about to follow. “Jo has quite the soft spot for our Yaz.” He winks as he is dragged out of the door by his grandfather.

Though the door is firmly shut behind them, Yaz can hear them bickering about hers and Jo’s potential feelings for each other as they make their way down the street. By the sound of things, Ryan wants to meddle as much as possible while Graham wants to let nature take its course. Yaz much prefers Graham’s way of things. She is glad they have gone, though, and that Jo is somewhere in the back because she knows her makeup - just a bit of mascara and lipstick - is doing nothing to disguise the current blush on her cheeks.

Once the blood from her cheeks has dispersed itself around her body as it should be, she calls out to Jo.

The blonde appears from around the corner, carrying a pile of books taller than herself. “Hi, Yaz!” She calls, her voice strained by the weight of the books. 

“Hey.” Yaz replies. “Can I give you a hand?”

“Nah, I’ve got this, tha-” Her sentence is cut short as the books threaten to topple over. Jo readjusts her stance to try to balance them.

Yaz takes the books away from the top that are now precariously balanced. “That’s probably a bit easier.” Says Yaz, smiling. It’s nicer too, she thinks, because now she can see Jo’s face. “Good to see you.”

Jo lets out a laugh. “It’s good to see you too - now I can see over these books!” She gestures with her whole body to the nearest bookshelves. “Just leave them in that aisle. I’ll sort them later.”

Following instructions, Yaz places them down gently unlike Jo who just drops them from where she’s standing. Miraculously, they land upright.

“Fancy a hot chocolate?” Jo asks.

“Yes, please.”

“Just whipped cream again?”

“You know me well already.” Yaz isn’t sure but she is almost certain she sees a pink tinge cross Jo’s cheeks. She doesn’t mention it, however, simply thanks Jo when she hands her a hot chocolate with a more than generous helping of whipped cream on top.

When Jo settles down, they get to discussing the contents of the book. How human can an AI be? Jo is certain that, if tinkered with enough, they are perfectly capable of being able to think for themselves, even begin to feel feelings like a human if given sufficient adaptations. Yaz is more dubious but agrees up to the point where they can think for themselves. She doesn’t think AIs are able to feel as humans do, especially feeling things like love. Love is a complex thing for humans, not yet fully understood. How could an AI be programmed to love if it were a feeling humans don’t have sufficient knowledge of? Jo counters that it is not just humans making AIs in  _ The Long Way to a Small, Angry Planet.  _ It also appears to be set much further into the future, so might it be possible then? Yaz isn’t sure. They leave that conversation and move seamlessly onto the next.

They talk of how incredible it must be to create so many new cultures in your mind - how does Becky Chambers do it? They also go off on a slight tangent about all the places they’ve travelled and the amazing things they’ve seen. Jo brings the conversation to an abrupt halt when she’s telling a tale of how she finds it amazing that some cultures can be so different but still have smallest moments of solidarity that link them. The time such a feeling was strongest, Jo relays, was in a time of sheer fear and desperation. She and her friends were on holiday together in Bulgaria. It was the first time the group had been out of the UK without their parents. They didn’t know the area or the language, and this became quite the issue when they got lost on their way back from a waterpark. Somehow, they had managed to miss their bus stop by miles, and were dropped in the middle of nowhere. After walking for what felt like hours, they came across a familiar sight. It was a shop. Jo had never been so relieved to see a Lidl in all of her life.

Yaz thinks her story is a little bizarre, and probably wasn’t the link between cultures that Becky Chambers was trying to elicit, but Yaz doesn’t care. Jo’s enthusiasm for everything is infectious, and Yaz hopes someday she might be able to get so excited about so much as the prospect of a Lidl.

Discussions of shared aspects of cultures transitions into the idea of found families. The crew on  _ The Wayfarer  _ are a mix of personalities as well as species, and yet they still manage to find a piece of home within one another.

Such a topic brings tears to Yaz’s eyes. This time, she cannot fight them off. A silent tear rolls down her cheeks as she thinks of her found family with Helly and Sarah. It’s silly, she knows. They’re not  _ gone. _ They’ve just moved. It doesn’t stop the pang of pain in her chest.

“Hey, you okay?” Jo leans forward to gently rest her hand on Yaz’s thigh. She has noticed the tear fall from her new friend’s eye. She is pretty sure she knows its reason for falling and kicks herself for her mindlessness. The Porters had told her of their favourite customer and had spoken of her as if she were their own child. They are Yaz’s found family. It is too early to speak to Yaz about found families, she realises, and feels her heart tighten with guilt. “Want a distraction?” She offers.

Yaz nods but does not look up as she does not want Jo to see the fresh tears building up in her eyes.

And so, Jo goes on to talk in great detail about the time she unsuccessfully tried to impress a date by trying to run up a slide - she fell flat on her face before she had even got halfway up. Then she describes the one and only time she had tried to play football as a child. She had played in defence and managed to save a goal just before the final whistle blew, allowing her team to win. However, she had saved the ball with her face and ended up in the accident and emergency department with a broken nose. She continues along the line of humility. How else to make someone stop feeling bad about their current circumstance than to make them feel bad for you instead? Jo natters on about how to be very careful to never get toothpaste in your eye and why it is always best to carry buttered toast upside-down.

This is when Yaz finds out that Jo can talk for England, and would probably talk for the universe if given the chance. But Yaz is grateful for it. “Thank you.” She says, a true smile on her lips. “I feel better now.”

“Good!” Says Jo. “But if you ever need it, I have plenty more from where that came from.” She pats Yaz’s knee, and Yaz can feel the heat from her fingers through her jeans. “Back to the book talk maybe?”

Yaz nods and is about to talk about her love for how humanity is portrayed in the books - that it offers motivations and capacity for evil but allows the characters to choose the opposite - when she notices a slightly panicked look on Jo’s face. “Are you alright?” She asks.

“I just realised the time.”

Yaz flicks her eyes to the clock. They widen.

“Indeed.” Says Jo. “How it’s already midnight, I’ll never know! But I’m opening up the shop at seven for the commuters to pop in and grab a coffee.”

“I shall leave you be, then.” Says Yaz, jumping up from her seat. “It’s been really nice, though.” She continues, making her way towards the door.

“Time certainly does fly when you’re having fun.” Says Jo, and Yaz can feel the warmth dripping from her words.

“I’ll see you at the next meeting?” 

“‘Course!” Jo pulls Yaz in for a hug before the police woman leaves. Though, judging by the slightly shocked look on her face, Jo is just as surprised at her actions as Yaz. “Well, I’ll see you in two weeks?” She says clumsily.

“I’ll see you then.” Yaz smiles and leaves the bookshop. She hopes she might see Jo before then, though, and toys with the idea of changing her daily coffee stop every now and then to the bookshop. It’s a little out of the way, but Yaz thinks it will be worth it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you for reading !! i hope you enjoyed it :D and i hope perhaps you might go on to read the long way to a small angry planet bc i cannot recommend it enough !
> 
> as always, pls hmu on tumblr (@antiopesgirlfriend), im always up for a chat


	4. it was accidental

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry for the gap between uploads - i've just started back at placement and it was a stressful first week back with very little spare time. but im here now !!
> 
> as per, thank you to my beta @manyfandomed on tumblr. i fear it would not make sense without you <3
> 
> i hope you enjoy the read :)

Yaz did end up going to the bookshop for her morning coffee stop the Wednesday after their book club meeting on Tuesday. She also went on Thursday and Friday. And the entirety of the following week. It is now her regular morning coffee stop.

On the Wednesday, they had both realised they hadn’t chosen a book to read in preparation for the next book club meeting. After a quick look around the bookshop, they decided on  _ The Paying Guests.  _ Sarah Waters was an author they had both wanted to read for a while but had never got around to it. What better way to start than together. And so, Yaz had bought her copy and spent all of her spare time in the next two weeks with her nose burrowed in the book. It had turned out to be a lot wilder than she had expected, with many a twist and turn. She had been hooked.

* * *

 

As soon as Yaz steps into the bookshop, it is clear Jo feels the same way about the book. Her entire manner seems to be heightened - she zips around the shop, a bustling bundle of energy. She checks if Yaz wants a hot chocolate with whipped cream and busies herself making it.

“So,” says Jo, sitting in the chair opposite Yaz. “What are your thoughts?”

“It was a lot.” Says Yaz. “But I’ll start by saying I was not expecting it to include a murder,”

“I know!” Exclaims Jo, almost falling out of her seat in excitement. Suddenly, she stills. “I don’t think I’d be able to do that. Do you?”

Yaz eyes her quizzically. “I don’t think there are many people who would murder their husband, carry the body into the street and allow someone else to be trialled for the crime.”

“It was accidental.” Jo argues.

Yaz looks at her as if she’s grown an extra head. “And does that make it okay?”

“No.” Says Jo defensively. “Of course not! But you empathise with Lily throughout the book. It’s just…” Jo pauses. “I often wonder how much harder it must have been to be gay back then. It shows how far some people are willing to go to be themselves; it shows what is most important to them, and how truly flawed this can make us.

Jo’s words are more profound than Yaz had been expecting. She isn’t wrong. And it gives her a whole new perspective on the book. Yaz still firmly believes that murder is unacceptable (not to mention illegal) in all cases, and she’s pretty sure Jo agrees with her on that stance. But she doesn’t think she fully understood how difficult it was to be gay in Britain after the First World War until Jo had enlightened her. Yaz realises she has taken her ease of life for granted. She also knows she shouldn’t  _ have  _ to take it for granted. But she had things like Helly and Sarah, an accepting family, a safe country to live in and now the book club where she could safely be herself. It was things like that that other people could only dream of. “I didn’t think about it like that.” Yaz rasps, shamefully looking at her hands folded in her lap.

“That’s the beautiful thing about stories, Yaz.” Jo says gently. “They let us see ourselves in writing but also to offer us a slight understanding of lives we will never live.”

Her words offer Yaz a little bit of solace but she still feels guilty for her lack of thinking on the matter.

“Cheer up, love.” Says Jo. “The thing to remember about shame like this is it’s there because we’ve grown from our mistakes. It’s a sign you’ve grown as a person.”

Yaz meets Jo’s eyes. “How did you get to be so wise?”

“I’ve been around a little longer than you.” Jo smiles kindly, happy that Yaz seems to be coming around a bit. “Books have helped too. I’ve read quite the selection in my time.”

“Sounds like I’ve got some catching up to do.” Yaz is smiling, though it is somewhat weaker than usual. 

“You’ve got time!” Says Jo. “Plus, I’m sure I can help.”

“I’m sure you can too.” Yaz’s smile is brighter now.

Their eye contact lingers a little longer than what seems necessary. It is weighted, and grows more so each millisecond.

“But back to the book.” Jo clears her throat, her cheeks gaining a pinkish tinge. “Do you side with Frances and Lily?”

“I mean, I spent the whole book wanting them to be together, so I guess I do at least a little bit.”

“Me too. It was strange to root for a murderer.”

“Wasn’t it.”Yaz agrees. “Especially because I spend my working days trying to put them behind bars.”

Jo chokes on her hot chocolate. “So your job is…?”

“A police woman.” Yaz answers. It’s a job people don’t usually expect from a small woman. And once people have got over that, they seem to be overcome with some strain of lust reserved only for those in uniformed jobs. Usually it’s frustrating - Yaz just wants to do well without her job being sexualised. But something in the way Jo’s eyes darken makes her mind a little less.

“I guess I’ll have to make sure I don’t get into too much trouble around you.” Jo half-jokes. 

“Don’t worry.” Yaz smirks. “When I’m off duty, I’m off duty.”

Jo raises an eyebrow. “Is that so?”

“It is indeed.”

Once more, their eye contact remains, its heaviness felt around the room. Both women do not wish for the moment to end, but neither of them know how to let it continue. They drop their eyes, and with it falls the tension.

“What’s it like to be gay and in the police?” Jo asks, genuinely curious.

“Not bad to be honest.” Replies Yaz. “There’s a fair number of lesbians in the force. It’s harder being a woman of colour.” This time it’s Yaz who half-jokes.

Jo has the decency to look ashamed of her question, her cheeks pinkening. “I didn’t think of that.” She mumbles. “I was just comparing us as much as I could. Being gay doesn’t really affect selling books either.”

“Don’t worry about it.” Yaz assures Jo. “I knew you weren’t trying to ignore anything like that.” Yaz is a little distracted by the newfound knowledge that Jo is also definitely gay. All kinds of options flood before her eyes. “So, what brings you to Sheffield?” She asks, trying to distract herself from her distracting thoughts.

“The hills.” Is the first thing that comes out of Jo’s mouth. “I jest. But I like the bustle of a city with the promise of countryside nextdoor. Plus, the prospect of taking over a bookshop with an LGBTQ+ following already was something I couldn’t pass up.”

“I’m glad it was you who took it over.”

“Me too.”

The pair spend the rest of the evening talking about the rest of the book, every now and then dropping in comments with hidden meanings they don’t quite dare to speak aloud.

This week, they remember to decide on a book for the following fortnight -  _ Code Name Verity _ . As they settle on it, they know they will spend the next two weeks seeing each other every weekday morning, trying not to spoil the book for the other, and trying to be as subtle as possible while flirting with each other over the purchase of Yaz’s morning coffee.

As they bid their goodbyes, there is a moment. It is infinitesimal. But there is a point in time when Yaz feels a magnetic pull towards Jo. Their eyes flick from eyes to lips and back. If she leans in, Yaz can easily capture Jo’s lips in a kiss.

But she doesn’t.

Something inside her clicks, making her hug Jo instead. They depart in the same way as the previous book club meeting, only this time the hug is deliberate and initiated by Yaz. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> well there we have it gang. i hope it was okay <3 thank you to all of you who leave kudos and comments - it proper makes my day when i see them :D as always, feel free to hmu on tumblr (antiopesgirlfriend) for chats.
> 
> (ps. i recommend the paying guests. it's a long ass book but damn does it get you hooked)


	5. sorry for my state

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi gang !! pls enjoy <3
> 
> thank you to @manyfandomed for being a bomb ass beta again <3

Once again, Yaz is greeted at the door by Graham and Ryan. She cannot help the roll of her eyes. “Evening, boys.” She says, clearly unimpressed with their shenanigans.

Graham has the grace to look guilty. “Good evening, Yaz. We are on our way out, I promise.”

Yaz hums in disbelief. She wonders what excuses they give Jo about their sudden later hours on a Tuesday. And why, even then, they still can’t stay for the book club. She doubts their lies are believable, and she hopes they don’t hurt Jo’s feelings too much.

“Don’t worry, Yaz.” Says Ryan in a way that very much worries Yaz. “We won’t be there to interrupt your  _ meeting  _ with Jo. Nor will anyone else.”

“What do you mean?” Yaz narrows her eyes at him.

“Nothing.” Says Graham, a little too loudly before Ryan can say anything.

But Ryan can’t hold it in. “She took all the posters for the book club down last Wednesday. She also stopped telling people about it at the till. You must have impressed her with something.” His smirk widens as he notices Yaz’s blush. “And it looks like she’s doing something right too.”

“That is enough, Ryan.” Snaps Graham, sternly. “I’ll not let him stay late again.” He says to Yaz apologetically.

“Thanks, Graham.” She says, then turns to Ryan with a glare. “Bye, Ryan.” She pushes past him to get into the bookshop. She can hear them arguing again but tunes them out. Gossip had never done her any good. 

“Good evening, Yaz.” Comes a muffled voice from the back.

“Good evening, Jo!” Yaz calls back, standing on her tiptoes in an attempt to see Jo over the books piled upon the till. “How are you?”

“Can’t complain, can’t complain.” Jo replies, appearing from behind a shelf, looking slightly dishevelled. Her hair is ruffled; her parting non-existent. Even her top - a button-down shirt covered in tiny little rainbows - is half-untucked with a few too many buttons undone. “How’re you keeping, Yaz?”

“Oh, the same.” Says Yaz, her voice increasing a few octaves. All of her focus is on not staring at the skin exposed on Jo’s chest. 

“Sorry for my state.” Jo says, a little breathlessly. “Lugging books around it quite the workout.” She flexes her biceps, giving each of them an exaggerated peck.

Yaz half wants to laugh and half wants to ogle the woman. The act is so incredibly Jo-like but her body is so toned.  It is something usually disguised by her baggy clothes, but today it is unmissable.

“Take a seat!” Says Jo when Yaz says nothing in return. She doesn’t seem to mind the lack of a comment - she’s just keeping the conversation going. 

“Thank you.” Says Yaz, sitting in her usual spot, a hot chocolate with a mountain of cream on top waiting for her. “Is this mine?”

Jo nods enthusiastically. “I thought I’d make it ready for your arrival. You seem to like them.” Her grin is infectious.

Once more, Yaz thanks Jo. It is a small gesture but it feels significant in her heart. It was like coming home after a hard day’s work to a warm cup of tea. But this time with a little more love. A good hot chocolate is a faff to make - the effort should always be held dear. And Jo’s hot chocolates are the best Yaz has ever had.

“What were your thoughts on the book then?” Asks Jo. “Love it or hate it?”

“Love it.” Says Yaz. “You have a knack for choosing good books. It’s almost as if it’s your area of expertise.”

Jo puts her hand on her chest as if responding to immeasurable adulation. “You flatter me, Yasmin Khan.”

“Well, it can’t be said that such things are false.” Yaz says. It is no word of a lie and the faux-front she had put on before slips away.

A blush appears across Jo’s cheeks and manages to reach the tips of her ears. 

Yaz continues talking in an attempt to evade Jo’s embarrassment. “I’m not usually one to read historical fiction, but I think that might be changing now. Queenie is quite the character. She’s got some guts.”

“Hasn’t she just! Reminds me a bit of you, actually. But when you read the book, you believe every word written down which is something to admire.” Says Jo. “And I feel like it’s a book that rewards the careful reader.”

This, Yaz ponders on for a little while. Surely every book Jo reads and enjoys rewards the careful reader. Then again, Yaz reasons, aside from the wit clear at face-value, there were quite a few passages she had read and re-read. Sometimes even several times. There was a fair portion that required a deeper understanding in order to infer correctly. Normally, Yaz hated re-reading parts of books. However, in this case, it was in no way a laborious task, and she can even see herself giving the whole book another read in the not too distant future. Yaz nods in response to Jo’s comment. Then she adds, “Are there any more books? Is it part of a series?”

Jo’s eyes shine. “I was hoping you would ask that.” She beckons Yaz to follow her as she makes her way towards a dimly lit aisle. 

Without a question, Yaz follows. Despite the lack of light, Yaz can still make out the sparkle that never seems to leave Jo’s eyes.

“Here.” Says Jo, pointing to several copies of two books. “As soon as I started reading  _ Code Name Verity,  _ I fell in love with the book. I ordered these in last Wednesday and they’ve been here ever since. From what I can gather,  _ Rose Under Fire  _ is a sequel of sorts, and  _ The Pearl Thief  _ is a prequel but was written after the other two.”

“I want to read them.” 

“Me too.” Says Jo. “But I think perhaps outside of our book club, don’t you?”

Yaz nods, gulping. There is little light where they are standing, but Yaz can see Jo’s face perfectly. The light available is making her look angelic, her blonde hair catching it and giving off the appearance of a halo.

They are also standing impossibly close. The bookcases have just about enough room for two people to sidle past each other. But when those two people are standing opposite each other having a conversation, backs to the bookshelves, their faces are much closer than they would normally be.

A little time passes and it feels like an eternity. Neither woman says anything, just lost in the other’s eyes and distracted by their own thoughts. Yaz’s head is clouded with thoughts about Jo. On more than one occasion, she had been overcome with a need to kiss Jo. Now, that feeling is more overwhelming than ever before. With a burst of sudden bravery, Yaz leans forward, their lips almost touching.

“Book club!” Jo calls, turning on her heel and vacating the aisle, leaving Yaz standing there alone, wondering if she had misread all the signals. She curses herself for allowing herself to listen to Ryan and, to an extent, Graham. Yaz follows Jo back to their seats, dreading updating Helly and Sarah on the new circumstance between her and her now  _ clearly  _ unrequited crush. She sat down, not quite able to reach Jo’s eye. For once she had allowed herself to be as excited about something as Jo is about everything. And she had made a fool of herself.

As they discuss the book further, Yaz slowly lets herself engage in more conversation. Plus, for someone who can usually talk for hours, Jo seems to have become rather subdued. Yaz feels a need to drive the conversation more than normal. However, despite their now unchattiness, they still manage to get sidelined by unrelated topics. This is when Jo asks a question that is unlike her.

“So, what do you do like to do in your spare time?”

It isn’t that Jo doesn’t seem to be the kind of person to care about such things, rather she is the type to be more interested in the intricacies of favoured activities. Added to that, the way she says it seems almost clunky, as if she’s asking the question to retrieve a completely different answer.

Nevertheless, Yaz answers. “I like making use of the police facilities. I play quite a bit of badminton and squash with my colleagues.”

“And do you partake in such activities with a special someone?”

Yaz looks at Jo in confusion. In all honesty, she is over trying to understand subtle behaviours. As shown earlier, it doesn’t end well. Yaz just wants to get to the point. “Are you asking me if I have a girlfriend?”

Jo nods, her cheeks a darker pink than Yaz has ever seen them.

“I do not.”

A beat of silence passes before Jo mumbles her response. “I don’t either.”

“Okay.” Says Yaz. If it were any other time, she would be sure she was being asked on a date. But Jo had quite literally run away when she’d tried to kiss her not even an hour ago.

Jo takes a deep breath - the kind she only takes before she’s about to start rambling. “I don’t have a girlfriend. And you don’t have a girlfriend. And we clearly enjoy each others company. At least, I do. I love spending time with you. My favourite times of the month are when we have these book club meetings. And then, each morning, the highlight of my day is when you come in for your coffee. Whenever the bell rings above the door and it’s not you, I feel my heart drop.” Jo takes another deep breath, and Yaz wonders if Jo has taken a single breath since the first. She hopes she has. Jo continues. “Would you, Yasmin Khan, like to go on a date with me?”

“Yes!” Yaz is quick to answer, She is relieved to find her previous embarrassments wash away.

“Thank God.” Jo breathes. “That would have been awkward if you had said no.”

“Are you mad?” Yaz says. “I thought it was so clear I liked you. I didn’t try to hide my feelings, I changed you to my regular coffee stop even though it adds an extra twenty minutes to my journey to work,  _ and  _ I tried to kiss you earlier. Which, might I say, led to you pieing me really quite spectacularly.”

“Sorry.” Says Jo. And, to her credit, she does look rather shameful. “I panicked. People don’t usually like me like that. They think I’m a bit much.”

“I think you’re the perfect amount.” Says Yaz. “When’s our date?”

Jo fumbles over her answer. It is clear she hadn’t been expecting Yaz to say yes. “Saturday? I could pick you up at eleven?”

“Sounds good.” Says Yaz. She scribbles her phone number on a piece of paper and hands it to Jo. “Message me and we’ll organise the details later in the week.”

“Brilliant!” Says Jo, smiling like she’s won the lottery. She looks to the clock. “It’s getting late. Will I see you in the morning?”

Yaz smirks. “Definitely.” She and Jo both stand to hug goodbye. As they lean into the hug, Yaz lets her lips graze Jo’s cheek, leaving a light kiss. Jo’s skin flushes hot at the touch. “Goodnight, Jo.”

“Goodnight, Yaz.”

Just as Yaz is stepping into her home, she gets a text from an unknown number. As she reads it, she smiles.

_ looking forward 2 our date on sat xx _

Yaz replies. 

_ I’m counting down the days already xx _

Yaz is settling in for an early night when she gets a reply.

_ only 4 days! Xx _

She fires off a quick goodnight text before laying down to sleep. She falls asleep feeling happier than she has in a long time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you for reading !! i hope this was okay :D if you have the chance, deffo read code name verity. i didn't do it justice but damn is it a good book.  
> thanks to those of you leaving comments and kudos!! you all brighten my day <3


	6. would you like to follow me to your chariot of gold?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi gang! im back :D sorry for the delay - life is not being chill atm
> 
> thanks to @manyfandomed, the brilliant beta <3
> 
> i hope you like this update <3 date time !!

Today is Saturday - it’s Yaz’s first date with Jo. She hopes it will be the first of many.

All Jo has told Yaz is that they will be going to a museum. That is all Yaz knows. She has not been told which museum it is, or even what kind of museum it is. Dressing differently for different kinds of museums is not something Yaz could say she had ever thought about before, but now she is panicking about it. What she would wear to the Mining Museum in Matlock is in no way similar to what she would wear to the Sheffield Institute of Arts Gallery. After a quick worried text to Ryan, she settles for an outfit somewhere in the middle. She chooses her most comfortable pair of skinny jeans, a light blue shirt dotted with navy stars and her favourite maroon leather jacket.

Yaz is ready at five to eleven. It is a good time to be ready for. She has five minutes until Jo is due to arrive, ensuring she doesn’t have to rush if she is early and so she doesn’t have time to second-guess all her decisions if Jo is on time or slightly late.

Upon a quick glance out of the window of her flat, Yaz can see an unfamiliar car. An old, bright blue Nissan Micra is something that cannot be missed. She’s never seen it before but it has been there for at least half an hour already. 

As soon as the clock strikes eleven o’clock, Yaz hears her doorbell ring. In a surprisingly calm and collected manner, Yaz makes her way to the door, picking up her tiny rucksack on the way, checking it contained her phone, purse and all of the necessities. When she knows it does, she opens the door to a grinning but jittery Jo. “Good morning.” Yaz smiles.

“Morning, Yaz!” Replies Jo. “Would you like to follow me to your chariot of gold?” She holds her arm out and Yaz links elbows with her. 

Yaz is used to holding hands on dates, not linking arms. However, she doesn’t find herself minding. It is a quirk that comes with the unusual Jo. It made her smile. Plus, she can always hold Jo’s hand later.

Jo leads Yaz straight to the bright blue Nissan Micra. Somehow, Yaz is not surprised to find its true owner. She lets Jo open the door for her and gets into the car. Chivalrous, she notes.

When Jo gets into the car, she doesn’t wait until she closes the door before she starts talking. “I have to admit, I was a little early this morning.”

“Yeah?” Says Yaz, pretending that she hadn’t seen Jo’s car outside since about twenty-five past ten.

Jo nods slowly. “I didn’t want to be late so I set off early. Also, I had to allow time for the sat nav being wrong. You can’t trust those things.” She eyes up the sat nav on the windscreen in suspicion. 

Yaz too looks at the sat nav. It looks as though it is at least ten years old. “Have you updated it since buying it?”

“No.” Jo stares at her sat nav, mouth slightly agape. “Am I supposed to do that?”

“Yes!” Yaz laughs. “Let me take it home tonight and I’ll bring it back to you on Monday. Then you can start trusting it a little more.”

“Thank you.” Says Jo sheepishly. “I would appreciate that.”

“Anytime.” Yaz replies warmly. But, before she can enquire as to where they are going, Jo begins talking again. 

“If you want to listen to some music, just plug my phone in and choose whatever you want.” She nods to her phone as she starts the car and she begins the drive.

Yaz complies. She decides it is best to choose songs she likes from Jo’s existing playlists. It seems sensible - a surefire way to ensure she chooses music they can both enjoy. Jo’s music taste is what Yaz would describe as eclectic. And her playlist names are somewhat questionable.

The first playlist Yaz clicks on is ‘ _ organise ur life pls’.  _ It is full of some great songs - she can’t complain. But she is a little confused about how the Sound of Music can be followed by the Black Eyed Peas. Yaz adds a few songs from that playlist before moving onto another - ‘ _ let’s get knitting’.  _ It is a playlist Yaz doubts many other (if any) people have, but she has to give credit to Jo for putting so many good songs in such an unusually specific playlist. 

While Yaz keeps adding songs to the queue, she strikes up a new conversation with Jo. “Where are you taking me on our date?”

“Only about twenty minutes away.” Replies Jo.

Yaz cannot stop her eye roll. “But  _ where _ are we going?” Asks Yaz. “Specifically.” She adds.

“A museum.” Responds Jo. She bites her lip to stop herself smiling.

Exasperation is not quite the state Yaz has reached but she is close. “But which museum?” 

“Oh!” Says Jo in mock sudden realisation. “That is something for me to know and for you to find out. A surprise, if you will.”

“You are something else.”

Jo isn’t sure if it is a compliment but thanks Yaz for the comment anyway. 

The remainder of her journey is spent in comfortable silence with a few short conversations thrown in. At least, the comfortable silences are silent on Yaz’s end. For Jo, they are filled with bursts of singing along to the songs Yaz had chosen.

Their journey, as Jo predicted, was not long and they arrived at their destination in a little over fifteen minutes. 

After bad crash when she was younger, Yaz is wary of being driven by new people but Jo’s driving isn’t quite as haphazard as her usual self so Yaz feels safe in her hands. Jo is almost excessive in her use of the handbrake. It is effective, though. Yaz decides to not mention it but does quietly admire it. 

It is when Jo is parking that Yaz realises the date destination.

“Oh shit.” Yaz gasps.

“Is it okay?” Jo turns to Yaz, fearful that she had picked the wrong place.

“It’s amazing.” Says Yaz. “I’ve not been to Magna since I was a child. I’d almost forgotten its existence.”

Relief washes over Jo’s features. “Well, it’s time to get reacquainted.” She grins. “I love a science museum.”

“Me too.” Yaz grins back. “Let’s get stuck in.”

Magna, as Yaz had said, is a place which only holds memories of childhood shenanigans. She is sure Jo will fit in well. Her entire being can be easily compared to a child’s and her childlike curiosity and enthusiasm are two of the things Yaz likes the most about her. Yaz realises that this date is going to do one thing to her. Make her fall for Jo even more.

There are four pavilions in the museum - air, earth, fire and water - as well as the opportunity to see behind the scenes of what steelmaking was like in Sheffield.

Their first stop inside was  _ The Big Melt  _ \- the show about one of the original electric arc furnaces, unused since the decline of Sheffield’s steel industry. It is just a twelve-minute show but it feels so much longer. Each sound is so loud it can be felt deep in your core. 

The show is just the right amount of time for Yaz and Jo. It seems to literally shake away all the first date nerves and, at some point, Yaz’s hand finds Jo’s. Their little fingers lightly linking before Jo entwines all of their fingers together so they are properly holding hands. The darkness hides their laced hands but the sparks above them do nothing to mask the happiness on their faces. 

When the show finishes, neither of them let go of the other’s hand. Their fingers remain firmly intertwined as they make their way to the Air Pavilion. It hangs in the rafters of Magna and it is the place where the fun begins. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> iw'eklhsklc sorry i ended it there !!!!! the date was just getting so long so i did a lil split down the middle. therefore, next chapter, we will be finishing their date :D but i hope you still enjoyed this chap <3 thank u sm for reading and for commenting - it means a lot to one (1) whole loser (me) <3


	7. yaz fears she will have to physically restrain jo

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yayyy part two of the date !!! i hope you enjoy <3
> 
> as always, thank you so much to @manyfandomed for being a great beta for this gal who seems to struggle with both reading and writing. it would be unreadable without you <3

The Air Pavilion appears to be miraculously suspended in the roof. It is just as Yaz remembers, hanging overhead, lit up in fluorescent blues and purples.

When they step inside, Yaz notices the look on Jo’s face. It exudes so much joy, more so than half of the children present. For a split second, Yaz fears she will have to physically restrain Jo when it comes to waiting her turn amongst children. Then she kicks herself for thinking so poorly about Jo. She isn’t a monster who will push past children to do as she wishes. She will wait patiently, if a little bouncily.

It is as they wait for the smoke cannons that Yaz finds Jo is definitely the type to do the latter. They stand patiently in the queue, giants among children. Their hands are still fastly held. As their turn grows closer, Yaz can feel Jo’s hands growing clammier by the second and her bouncing increasing in both speed and strength. When it in their turn, Jo literally runs to the smoke cannon, dragging Yaz with her.

The smoke cannon is more of a smoke ring machine. It is a cylindrical chamber inside of which smoke gathers in the bottom. Enclosing it is a flat metal ring - the hole just big enough for an adult to fit their head into. When Jo voices this observation, Yaz’s eyes widen as she spits out a million reasons why she should not test said comment. Jo assures Yaz she never would as it would ruin her plan. Her plan, Jo explains, is to wait for as much smoke to build up in the drum as possible. Then, on her count of three, she and Yaz are to press down on the top with all their might to get the biggest smoke ring possible.

And so, Yaz and Jo position themselves opposite each side of the drum. They wait for it to fill and then lock eyes. It is time.

“Three… Two… One!” Jo exclaims in glee.

With all of their strength, they shove the metal plate down and they watch in awe as their smoke cloud floats to the ceiling, dispersing with their push.

Jo and Yaz leave the drum, Jo talking at a mile a minute about how amazing it is to manipulate displacement for their own enjoyment. 

Together, they entertain themselves with the remaining activities in the Air Pavilion including the spin chairs. Yaz (way too easily) manages to persuade Jo to sit in one and see how fast she can spin her. Jo jumps into the chair with naïve gusto. She also manages to exit with the same amount of energy. This, as it turns out, wasn’t the best course of action, as Jo stumbles out of the chair and only remains on her feet because Yaz catches her when she falls. 

Next on the list to visit is the Water Pavilion. This is the part Yaz has the most vivid memory of enjoying. She also remembers never leaving it dry. It seems not much has changed.

The first thing Yaz and Jo see is two pools either side of the path to the main part of the Water Pavilion. They are perfectly smooth and, therefore, oh so tempting. Jo drops Yaz‘s hand and literally runs down the path, one hand in each of the pools, causing ripples to transverse across the water. At the end, she turns sharply to face Yaz, the look of pride on her face only achievable through mischief.

“You are a literal child.”  Yaz rolls her eyes fondly, half skipping to catch up with Jo. When the smile on Jo’s face drops the smallest amount, Yaz adds, “But I wouldn’t have you any other way.“ She takes Jo’s hand in her own, content that the smile is restored. Yaz lifts their hands, pressing a light kiss to Jo’s fingers and lets their linked hands fall between them once more. If she were to say she wasn’t pleased to have caused the blush that crosses Jo's cheeks, she would be lying.

Yaz and Jo enjoy the rest of the Water Pavilion in a similar fashion, though they do wish they had brought coats. All of the children appear to have received the memo, unlike them. They are decked from head to toe in waterproofs - anoraks, waterproof trousers, all-in-ones. Some are even wearing wellies. These are all smart choices, Yaz and Jo realise, as they get soaked by rain clouds and water guns.

Following the Water Pavilion is the Earth Pavilion. Yaz has no recollection of it whatsoever. Now, though, she knows she will. Jo’s reactions to everything are unforgettable. Yaz is paying more attention to Jo than she is to the exhibitions. But seeing Jo’s joy is worth it.

In the Earth Pavilion, Jo completely bypasses the JCBs and is completely taken by the pulley systems. Jo is rattling off potential ways for them to be used in her bookshop. Yaz tries to pay attention to her words but his overcome by the distraction of Jo’s face. There is a glow that encompasses her when she talks about think she is passionate about. And it just so happens she is passionate about the number of things. Yaz tunes in just as Jo is suggesting a pulley system for hot drinks and Yaz has to step in and remind her of the existence of health and safety guidelines.

Last, but certainly not least, is the Fire Pavilion. Within it is the mighty fire tornado. This is what Jo has been waiting for. It is five metres tall and a steady flame flickers and twists like a stream of water running from a tap.

Yaz, too, has been looking forward to this for the whole trip around.

“You like this.” Says Jo. It’s not a certain comment, but it’s definitely not a question either.

Yaz can see her own serenity mirrored on Jo’s face. “I do” Yaz replies slowly, softly. “There were never enough clouds for my Nani to cloud-watch where she was born. And here there are often too many to discern any specific shapes. But one thing that didn’t change between her homes was fire. You can see so many things within and between the flames if you look close enough. She introduced me to what she called fire-watching. We still do it now. Nani loves bonfire night.”

“I can see what you mean.” Says Jo, quietly. “Thank you for sharing that with me.”

Yaz smiles at her gently. “Anytime.”

The pair spends the rest of their time at the heat painting station. They create all kinds of masterpieces, the warmth from their hands leaving red, orange and yellow marks, stark against the black background.

what’s had felt like a short bout of fun turns out to have taken up almost four hours of the day. Jo drives Yaz back to her home, jumping out of the car so she can open Yaz’s door herself. Yaz steps out, sat nav in hand, thanking her and they are both stood on the pavement facing each other unsure of what to do next.

Once more, Yaz links their little fingers, not yet wanting to leave Jo’s company. “Today was fun.” She says. 

“It was.” Says Jo, suddenly becoming uncharacteristically shy. “Would you like to go on a second date?”

“I would love to.” Yaz pulls Jo a little closer by their linked fingers. 

“Is tomorrow too soon?”

“Tomorrow is perfect.” Yaz smiles, dropping her hold on Yaz’s little finger. She lifts her hand so it cups Jo’s jawline. Yaz waits for a minute nod of Jo’s head before she guides the slightly taller woman’s face towards her own, capturing her lips in a soft kiss. It is gentle, but there is an underlying eagerness showing how much they have both been yearning for this to happen. 

Just as she started the kiss, Yaz ends it, allowing their foreheads to rest against each other before she pulls away. She licks her lips with a peaceful smile. “I’ll see you tomorrow.” Yaz says, walking backwards towards her flat. 

“Not if I see you first!” Calls Jo. Then visibly winces at her choice of words. “I’ll text you later?”

“Not if I text you first!” Yaz replies, clearly teasing the blonde but also making her feel better about what she had said. 

When Yaz’s front door closes behind her, she can’t help but do a little fist- pump. It was the best first date she’d ever had. Yaz looks out of her window and laughs as she sees Jo do the exact same gesture in her car. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you for reading !! i hope you liked it <3 thank you again to all of you leaving comments and kudos !! puts a proper smile on my face every time <3


	8. the best stargazing spot in sheffield

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> here we are !!! date two
> 
> thank u to my beta @manyfandomed for being a babe once more <3

After their successful date on Saturday, Yaz and Jo organised their second date over text for the following day. It was only fair to let Yaz lead the organisation since Jo had sorted out the first. Yaz is more thoughtful than Jo though, or so she thinks. At least she is in the way she lets Jo know what to wear for the date. She does not let the activity slip but she does tell Jo to wrap up warm.

Wrap up warm is exactly what Jo does. Yaz picks her up from the bookshop and Yaz can barely see any of her face, for her knitted beanie and bright scarf wrapped around her neck and half of her face.

“Good evening, Jo.” Says Yaz. “If you’re in there?”

A muffled chuckle comes from somewhere beneath Jo’s scarf. “I am here!” She needlessly assures Yaz. “Good evening to you too.”

Yaz gestures for Jo’s scarf. “Could you maybe…” She mimes taking it off.

Jo abides, her face now completely visible (save for the portion of her forehead hidden by her hat). “Better?” She asks.

“Much.” Yaz smiles. She rolls up onto her tiptoes slightly to peck Jo on the lips.

When she pulls back, a soft smile is on Jo’s lips. “Maybe I should just forget this altogether.” She starts unwrapping it completely.

“No!” Yaz laughs, wrapping it back around Jo’s neck. “You’ll need it later.”

“Get a room.” Someone whines. It is Ryan. He appears from behind a bookshelf. 

“Evening, Yaz.” Graham shuffles out awkwardly, following Ryan’s steps. “Don’t mind him.” He nods towards his grandson. “I think sometimes he forgets he’s talking to his boss and not just Yaz.” He says pointedly in Ryan’s direction.

“Sorry, boss.” Ryan mumbles.

“No worries.” Says Jo, her scarf half on and half off. “But we should probably be leaving, shouldn’t we, Yaz?”

Yaz nods dramatically. “If we leave any later, the consequences could be disastrous.”

“In that case.” Says Jo. “I’ll see you two later.”

“Bye, Jo.” Says Graham.

“Bye, boss.” Says Ryan. He smirks. He has clearly not learned his lesson. “Enjoy your night, Yaz.” He winks at his oldest friend.

“Bye, Ryan.” Yaz replies with a roll of her eyes. “I hope he doesn’t cause you too many troubles.” She says to Graham.

“I can handle him - don’t you worry about me.”

And so, Yaz and Jo leave the bookshop, fingers interlaced.

A little more cautiously and with a little less handbrake action than Jo the previous day, Yaz drives them to the location of their second date. Jo still sings the whole way. She sings loudly with no apparent care for the original lyrics. Yaz reckons she prefers Jo’s versions to the originals. Every time she makes up her own words brings a bigger smile to Yaz’s lips, each one harder to mask than the previous. 

When they arrive, it is dusk. They had driven down a lane to reach a car park at the entrance of a wood. 

“Out we get!” Says Yaz, pulling her key out of the ignition. “Time to wrap up.” She steps out of the car. Jo gets out of the car before Yaz can open her door for her so Yaz just makes her way to the boot and puts on an extra hoodie, a scarf, a puffer jacket and her own woolly hat. She puts on her rucksack, wincing when something inside clunks loudly. Deciding it is probably fine, Yaz doesn’t check it. Instead, she takes Jo’s hand in her own and leads her away from the woods and up a steep farmer’s lane.

At the top, they are both out of breath and it’s getting harder to see where they are stepping.

“Are we almost there?” Asks Jo breathlessly.

“Just a few minutes after that stile and we’re there.” Yaz points ahead of them.

Jo nods in acknowledgement and follows Yaz towards the stile. She is beginning to think she may have wrapped up a little too much. To say she is overheating is a gross understatement.

Thankfully, Yaz knows the route well and, just as she had said, they make it to the brow of the moor in just a few minutes.

“Here we are.” Says Yaz. “The best stargazing spot in Sheffield.” She grins, squeezing Jo’s hand. “Or the best I’ve found so far, anyway.”

“Yaz.” Says Jo softly. “This is brilliant.”

“You think so?”

“I do.” Says Jo in awe, looking at the sky which is full of stars, all brightly twinkling.

“It’s not quite the countryside.” Explains Yaz. “We’re still in Sheffield. But we’re almost in the Peak District.”

“It feels like the countryside.” Says Jo. “That’s enough for me.”

Yaz takes Jo to the heather so they have a comfortable place to lie as they stargaze. They lie next to each other, their little fingers linked between them. The pair talk about everything and nothing from stars to secrets, from favourite animals to favourite songs.

As the sky grows darker and the stars brighter, Yaz and Jo grow colder.

“Would you like a hot drink?” Yaz offers.

“Oh, I would  _ love _ a hot drink.” Jo replies. “What’s up for grabs?”

“Hot chocolate.” Yaz answers. “And marshmallows.” She adds.

Jo’s eyes widen and she sits bolt upright. “Actually?”

“Actually.” Yaz reaches for her bag and pulls a flask of hot chocolate from it. She is relieved to find the clunk did not cause any leaking. “Do you mind sharing? If you do, I have mugs. We can decant-”

“Nah, sharing’s fine.” Says Jo. And they share the hot chocolate with marshmallows on top.

Soon, their source of heat is gone and their teeth begin to chatter. It is Yaz who makes the suggestion they leave. But, she assures Jo the date is not yet over. 

With the help of a torch, she and Jo make it back to Yaz’s car. She drives them for a few minutes until they arrive at their next stop. It is a cosy pub by the name of  _ The Cricket _ . It is too dark to see outside but Jo is almost certain the name comes from a potential cricket pitch at the back, pictured in the photos which hang upon the walls. It isn’t a small pub but it does have the feel of one. A fire blazes in each room, adding a smoky scent to the smell of food in the air. The staff are friendly, each saying hello and then offering a genuine smile whenever they meet your eye.

Yaz and Jo find a table for two by the fire in the bar room. They decide to share the ‘pub snack board’ and enjoy a selection of the chef’s best small dishes. It is delicious and, after a slight squabble, Yaz is allowed to pay for their meal. After all, Yaz reasons, it is she who suggested the date. Therefore, it should be she who pays the bill. Jo gives in. It was her argument for paying for their Magna tickets. She figures the same argument should get the same reception each time.

“Fine.” Jo gives in. “But only if I can pay for the next one.”

“Deal.” Says Yaz, placing her card down on the bill. 

At the prospect of a third date, Jo’s eyes darken and Yaz can only assume her own do the same. All of a sudden, Yaz feels an intense need to get out of the pub - Jo in tow. As soon as the meal is paid for, Yaz grabs Jo’s hand and drags her to her car.

On their journey home, Yaz spends half the journey building up the courage to ask a single question. “Do you want me to drop you at home or do you want to come to mine?”

Jo chokes on air, not expecting the question. “Would it be okay to go back to yours?”

“‘Course.” Says Yaz. “I wouldn’t have suggested it if it wasn’t.”

“Then I’d like that a lot.” Says Jo.

The door at Yaz’s barely closes behind them before Yaz’s lips are on Jo’s, Jo’s back pressed against the door. They kiss, Yaz’s body pressing against Jo’s, her foot between Jo’s feet, her thigh between Jo’s thighs. A quiet moan escapes Jo’s lips and Yaz feels a tight pull in her lower abdomen. Yaz shifts her attention to Jo’s neck and the gasp that Jo releases only spurs her on.

“Do you have anywhere more comfortable we could take this?” Asks Jo between breaths.

“My bedroom?”

Jo nods eagerly and lets Yaz lead her to her room. They continue from where they left off and don’t tire until it gets late. Yaz rolls off Jo, groaning. “Sorry, I’m feeling sleepy now.”

“Don’t apologise.” Jo yawns. “Me too.”

“Do you want to stay?”

“If that’s okay?”

“I wouldn’t have suggested it if it wasn’t.”

As quickly as they can, they get ready for bed, Yaz lending Jo a pair of pyjamas and a toothbrush. They fall asleep on their sides, Jo’s back flush against Yaz’s front, Jo feeling safe wrapped in Yaz’s arms. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you very kindly for reading - i hope you liked it <3 as always, thank you to those of you leaving kudos and comments! i can honestly say they brighten my day when i see them <3


	9. i just got some proper juicy oranges

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey gang !! back again !!
> 
> thank you @manyfandomed again ily <3

Ever since their dates, Yaz and Jo hadn’t been able to keep themselves apart. During the week, they had found excuses each morning to see each other later that day. By Wednesday, Ryan and Graham had both had enough. Yes, they were cute together. But from the outside it was becoming nauseating.

Wednesday was also the last day they let Jo man the coffee machine. Any coffees ordered while Yaz was there took a little too long to make. It was Graham who made the executive decision to move Jo to the bookshop floor in the morning so she would stop holding up the customers. Obviously, as the boss, Jo made the ultimate decision, but she agreed with Graham. This way she could satisfy her customers  _ and  _ see Yaz without threatening business. It was the best kind of decision.

Ryan, on the other hand, was watching their interactions with glee. He had so much he could take the mick out of Yaz for now. It was amazing. 

Now, it is Saturday once more. Jo is working at the bookshop alongside both Ryan and Graham. Ryan is just about to message Yaz about why she hasn’t come to visit Jo yet when she walks straight through the door, the jangling bell above signalling her entrance.

“Speak of the devil.” He greets her.

“Hi, Satan!” Yaz replies in an equally cheeky tone. “Hi, Graham.” She adds.

Graham responds politely and points her towards Jo.

“Hi, Yaz!” Exclaims Jo, shyly pecking Yaz on the lips in greeting.

“Hey.” Says Yaz, smiling. She wonders if Jo will ever stop blushing so easily around her “Are you ready?”

Jo nods. “Ready as I’ll ever be!” She runs to the back to gather the few belongings she’d brought with her to work. With her book in one hand and her coat draped over the other arm, she reappears, the permanent grin ever present on her face. “Shall we?”

“We shall.” Yaz lets Jo lead her out of the shop. 

Ever the chivalrous one, Jo opens the door to let Yaz out. She even sprints to Yaz’s car so she can let Yaz into her own car. 

Yaz mutters a sheepish thank you and waits for Jo to strap herself in before setting off. They chat about meaningless things as Yaz drives them over to Jo’s. They have been to Yaz’s a fair bit but never to Jo’s thus far. Yaz is growing more and more curious as they near her house, not quite sure what to expect from it.

Jo instructs Yaz to pull into her drive - her car is in the garage so there’s enough room for Yaz to park there. The drive sits in front of a tall and narrow terraced house. When they step inside, Yaz is overcome by how Jo-like it is. The corridor is long and lined with what Yaz can only describe as an attempt at abstract art. Her lounge is unexpected but also unmistakingly Jo. Everywhere smells like her, putting Yaz immediately at ease.

Jo has a modest television placed inside a dark shelving unit. Dotted around the unit are series of books along with various items from travels to far off places. The arrangement seems higgledy-piggledy but the placement of everything feels right.

In front of this stands a glass coffee table, its legs chunky tree stumps. Opposite the television is a single worn - but very comfortable looking - sofa. Yaz presumes this is where they will be doing the reading.

“I like the place.” Says Yaz, shrugging off her jacket to reveal her favourite starred jumper. 

“Me too!” Says Jo. “I really wanted a purple sofa but I couldn’t find one anywhere so I got purple cushions to make up for it.” Jo explains. She looks so proud of herself. Yaz shakes her head fondly with a smile.

Never one to waste a moment, Jo ushers Yaz onto the sofa so she can get comfy and start reading her copy of  _ The Night Circus _ . With her shoes left in the hall, Yaz reckons it’s okay to put her feet up. So she rests her book open on the arm of the sofa and tucks her feet under her, one of the purple cushions perfectly filling the gap between her body and the back of the sofa.

“Can I offer you a drink?” Says Jo.

“Can I have a glass of water, please?” Replies Yaz.

“You can indeed!” Jo makes her way to the kitchen and, after a few mildly concerning crashes, she returns with two mason jars full of water with crushed ice on top. “I put in some ice. I hope you don’t mind.” Says Jo. “I just got a new ice machine and I’m trying to make the most of it.”

“That explains the noises.”

Jo nods in agreement. “It is rather clunky but that’s all part of the fun!” And so, Jo settles on the sofa next to Yaz. She isn’t touching Yaz, but Yaz feels the seat dip next to her. She can also feel the blonde’s hesitation. This is proven by her jumping back up once more. “I want a snack. Do you want a snack?” Jo asks, head cocked, bouncing slightly on the balls of her feet. She is the picture of restlessness.

“What’re you offering?” Asks Yaz, untucking her feet and settling them on the floor.

“I just got some proper juicy oranges?”

“I’ll have one of them then, please.” Yaz smiles as Jo leaves to return to the kitchen. Her smile drops when she hears Jo mutter something about her new shiny knives. The potential sharpness of them is something Yaz doesn’t want to think about when picturing Jo trying to cut a round object. Deciding that it is silly to worry about such things, particularly when concerning a grown woman, Yaz shakes her head and returns her focus to her book.

Moments later, Yaz hears a scream from the kitchen.  _ The knives! _ She thinks, overcome with dread. Thankfully, Yaz manages to find the kitchen with ease, only to find Jo bent over, hands putting pressure around her eyes.

“Jo!” Calls Yaz, worried. “Are you okay?”

Jo groans. “I was trying to peel an orange for you but the  _ rascal  _ squirted  _ juice  _ into my  _ eye _ !” Jo whines, clutching at her right eye. 

“Oh, thank God.” Yaz breathes.

“Thank God?!” Jo exclaims. “I can’t see!”

“Sorry.” Yaz lightly chuckles. “I just thought you’d had an accident with a knife.”

“Me? Never.” Says Jo. “Orange juice isn’t as bad as toothpaste to the eye, mind.”

“I’ll do whatever I can to never get either in my eyes.” Promises Yaz.

“You’re a smart one.” Jo pats her on the head and sends Yaz back to the lounge where she will join her after battling another orange. Jo returns minutes later, her right eye red and slightly watering still. “Here you go.” She passes Yaz an orange and they begin snacking. 

Yaz has to put her book down. Oranges are not particularly conducive to reading, it turns out, and Yaz and Jo take a break from their reading to eat.

“I cannot believe you thought I’d cut myself with a knife.” Comments Jo.

“What was I supposed to think?”

“More highly of me!” Says Jo, not offended, just unsure as to how she’d fostered such a careless reputation. 

“In that case, I will strive to do so.” Replies Yaz, trying to humour Jo’s request but unsure if she can actually carry it out. “But if I hear screaming, I’m going to come and check on you no matter the cause.”

“I can look after myself, you know.” Says Jo.

“I know.” Says Yaz. “But it’s nice to be looked after too.”

Jo nods thoughtfully. “You’re not wrong there.” She says. Then, on impulse, plants a slightly orangey and sticky kiss on Yaz’s cheek before jumping off the sofa to wash her hands. Yaz follows suit and is wholly unimpressed when Jo splashes water at her face.

Something Jo doesn’t know is that Yaz is never one to do that to. She will exact her revenge and Jo will be completely unsuspecting. But that is for Yaz to know and for Jo to find out. And so, as before, they settle down on the sofa ready to read. Yaz is sitting with her feet tucked under her, her knees leaning to the side. Jo is sitting next to her, cross-legged, leaning against Yaz just enough for them to both feel the other’s presence.

They sit in silence for approximately five seconds before Jo pipes up. “Do you want to listen to some music?”

“Yeah, something relaxing would be nice. No words, though.” Yaz replies.

“Of course.” Says Jo quietly. Then increases her volume to a painful level. “HEY, SIRI!” She shouts.

Yaz winces.

“Play some music!” Jo quietens a smidge, not wanting to burst Yaz’s eardrums, but still being unnecessarily loud.

The opening bars of a song of a song both women recognise plays, but neither can quite place its title. As the words play out, Jo stiffens. Her eyes widen.

_ I love myself _

_ I want you to love me _

It is when Jo starts frantically shouting at her phone to stop when Yaz recalls the title of the song. It is a classic by  _ Divinyls  _ and is known by the rather unsubtle name  _ I Touch Myself _ .

“Hey, Siri!” Jo shouts. “Stop! Next!”

No command works. Jo gets redder and redder as the song continues to play.

_ When I feel down _

_ I just want you to love me _

Jo throws her body at her phone, frenziedly fumbling with the phone in her hands. After what feels like an eternity the song stops, thankfully before the chorus begins to play. 

“That has never happened before.” She mumbles, unable to meet Yaz’s eye. She is pretty sure the brunette can hear the heart beating out of her chest.

“It is a rather unfortunate first song to play.” Teases Yaz. “Unless all of your songs are of that nature?”

“No!” Protests Jo. “Far from it.” 

“I’ll believe you this time.” Says Yaz, once again teasing the blonde. But when Jo looks so pained that she might not be telling the truth, she repeats her statement with more sincerity. Then she adds, “Can I get a full house tour? You seem a bit too bouncy for sitting down to read.”

“Sounds good.” Says Jo gratefully.

The first stop upstairs is Jo’s bedroom. They make it to the second stop two hours later. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you all for reading my pals <3 i hope it was okay :D thank you again to all of y'all leaving kudos and comments !! i love you all <3


	10. i do it how she likes it

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> wassup pals how's it cracking !! it's me again :D
> 
> thanks to my amazing beta once more @manyfandomed

Despite dating and Yaz and Jo being the only two making up the book club, the meetings continue every two weeks. They read many a book from many a genre. One fortnight they read a classic, the next a children’s book. They read non-fiction about the science in everyday life and follow it up with a heart-wrenching tale from the point of view of a child who loses his brother in a school shooting. After that one, they need a happier book and decide on one by Fredrik Backman which supposedly centres around the warming aspects of family. It is Yaz’s suggestion. 

In between the book club meetings, of course, are dates and their daily morning meetings. With life getting busier, they sometimes only manage to have a single date each week where they see each other outside of the bookshop. It doesn’t impact on their feelings for each other, and sometimes a single film night is all they need. They do still see each other every day, after all. 

Their morning meetings have, on occasion, been quite the scene. Both Ryan and Graham have walked in on quite intense morning greetings. More than once. Ryan finds joy in interrupting them, loving how much it embarrasses his best friend. Graham splutters an apology and backs out of the room as quickly as he can, wishing he hadn’t seen as much as he had. Ryan and Graham wonder why Yaz and Jo haven’t learned to keep the personal aspects of their relationship in their own homes. Yaz and Jo wonder why Ryan and Graham haven’t learned to not go in the back in the mornings or at least to knock before they head inside. 

Now, though, it is time for their book club meeting for the Fredrik Backman novel. When Yaz steps into the bookshop, she is surprised to see Graham still in the shop but no Ryan inside. 

“I’ve got a bone to pick with you.” Says Graham. 

“Hello to you too.” Replies Yaz, unsure of what she could have done to rile Graham up even just a little bit. 

Graham holds up his copy of  _ A Man Called Ove _ . “Jo said you’d chosen this book because it was happier than the last. I was intrigued so I decided to give it a read. This, Yasmin Khan, is not a happy book.” He waves it Yaz’s face. 

He has a point, Yaz can’t deny that. “Sorry, Graham. I didn’t know it was going to be as sad as it was.” Yaz does feel bad. The storyline is a little too close to Graham’s life in the last year or so. Graham’s eyes are brimming with tears and Yaz can see the memories of Grace playing over in his mind. “I’m sorry, Graham. Truly, I am.”

Graham weakly tries to be subtle in wiping his tears from his eyes. “It’s okay, Yaz.” He says softly. “You weren’t to know. I do need to find a properly happy book now, though. And it won’t be picked by you.” He attempts to joke. 

Yaz offers him a kind smile but feels it isn’t sufficient to ease the pain the book churned up. 

They say their goodbyes and Jo comes out from the back. “Hi, love.” She says, kissing Yaz in greeting. 

“Hey.” Says Yaz, slightly subdued. “Has Graham been okay this week?”

Jo is honest. “He’s been a little down.” She says. “But I think it also helped him to see how much he values his friends and family so don’t worry about him too much.”

“Are you sure?”

“I’m certain.” Jo pulls Yaz into a tight hug. “Now, how about that hot chocolate?”

Yaz smiles. “I would love that.”

And so, Jo sets out to make Yaz’s hot chocolate. She doesn’t like it when Yaz is upset. Yaz would murder her if Jo were to tell anyone but Jo finds out (quite early on) that Yaz cries at films. A lot. Jo herself has never been one to cry at films but when she hears Yaz’s sniffles or feels her tears soak into her shirt, Jo can feel herself welling up a bit. 

To cheer Yaz up a little, Jo puts extra marshmallows on top of Yaz’s hot chocolate. She hopes it will put a small smile on Yaz’s face.

It does.

They begin talks of the book. Neither had expected the depth of the story - the way it broke your heart and slowly pieced it back together only to shatter it once more. The seemingly unlovable Ove worked his way into your heart until he made it his home. As the story progressed, Yaz and Jo found a soft spot for this old, Swedish, cantankerous, taciturn, inflexible, militaristic man. Despite the savage emotional blows, Backman managed to find places to put unwavering optimism and laugh out loud moments. 

“I like the hope Backman instils.” Says Jo. “Ove has experienced nothing but loss his whole life. He sees himself as surrounded by idiots and disappointment but the families around him offer unmatched hope and you see him grow just as much as the children.”

Yaz nods. “It’s the aspect of found families again. This book does such a good job of showing the importance of them.”

Jo is about to add her thoughts when Yaz’s phone rings.

“Hello?” Yaz answers, confused. The number is withheld and she isn’t expecting a call. However, when she hears the voices at the other end, she relaxes. It is Helly and Sarah. A bright grin takes over her face when she realises. 

Helly and Sarah explain they aren’t ringing from their usual number because they knew Yaz wouldn’t pick up if she knew it was them while she was with Jo. And they are keen to talk to her since she’s making their favourite customer so happy. Yaz loves them but their nosiness is at a level she cannot comprehend. Alas, Jo is happy to talk to them.

All Yaz can hear is Jo’s end of the conversation and, as it goes on, she grows more and more concerned. Especially because Jo seems completely unfazed by her answers.

“I like her a lot.” Jo smiles softly.

“Yes.”

“No.”

“I do it how she likes it.”

“Usually I only put two in but if she fancies it, I sometimes put in a third.”

“Well, she could be lying but she said mine are better than she’s had before. Although she did also say she hadn’t had it much before I came along.”

With each of Jo’s replies, Yaz blushes more and her eyes widen. Soon, she can’t take it anymore. She grabs the phone back. “What are you asking her?” Yaz asks through gritted teeth.

“We like her a lot.” Says Helly.

“It sounds like she is perfect for you.” Adds Sarah.

“But what were you talking about?” Yaz asks. “Do I want to know?”

“Only the important things, dear.” Says Helly.

“Sarah, what were you asking?” Yaz tries for the third time.

Sarah answers this time. “We were asking about how she makes your tea.”

“Yeah, two spoons of sugar as you like it. Sometimes three, it seems.” Helly adds. “We approve.”

Relief floods through every part of Yaz. “Thank God.” She murmurs. “Since you approve now, are we allowed to get on with our book club?”

“Of course, dear.” Says Sarah.

“If that’s what the kids are calling it these days…” Says Helly.

“You’re just as bad as Ryan!” Exclaims Yaz. She is met by laughs from the other end of the line.

“Call us later this week?”Asks Sarah.

“I’d like that.” Replies Yaz. “Talk to you later!”

Helly and Sarah bid their goodbyes and hang up. 

Yaz returns her attention to Jo. “Sorry about them.”

“Nonsense!” Says Jo. “It was nice to talk to them.”

However, Yaz is still feeling awkward about the conversation she  _ thought  _ she’d overheard and changes the subject back to the book. That is what they are there for, after all.

First, she talks about her favourite quotes from the book. A quote comparing loving someone to moving into a house. Then the honest words about how we fear death but fear that it will take someone other than ourselves most of all. Second, she talks about the kinds of love in the book - romantic, platonic and familial - and how all are portrayed equally. 

Jo adds her thoughts to the conversation and leads it to a place she wants it to go. “It’s nice how the relationships grow naturally between people who are opposites in every conceivable way.”

“Like Ove and the children?” Asks Yaz.

“That.” Says Jo. “But also Ove and his wife.” Jo pauses but doesn’t give Yaz a chance to reply before she begins again. “Yasmin Khan.” She starts, rubbing her hands together as they grow clammy. “I like our time together. And I was wondering if we could make it - us - exclusive.”

Yaz smirks. “Are you asking me to be your girlfriend?”

“Well, yes. I suppose I am.” Jo’s cheeks flush.

“I would love to be your girlfriend!” Yaz responds as soon as the last word falls from Jo’s mouth Yaz leaps off her chair and manoeuvres around the coffee table so she can clamber atop Jo, straddling her thighs so she can kiss her. So she can kiss her  _ girlfriend _ .

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thanks for reading, gang! i hope it was alright <3 once more, thanks again to those of you who leave comments and kudos ~ they make me smile which is all i can ask for <3


	11. we are unable to open today

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey gang! welcome back <3 a few notes before this is uploaded  
> \- thank you to jolivira for an amazing piece of artwork based on chapter seven! <3  
> \- i think this fic is gonna be about 14 chaps long ????? but also i keep adding stuff so who the heck knows  
> \- this chap is gonna have us get to know ryan and graham a wee bit more so it is less thasmin-centric
> 
> as always, thank you to @manyfandomed on tumblr for being an increds beta once again <3

Running a bookshop has fewer breaks than Jo would like. Therefore, on the odd occasion, Jo closes the bookshop to give her staff (and herself) a well-earned break. It isn’t a common occurrence but it probably happens more than it should.

This is why Yaz, Ryan and Graham arrive at the bookshop together only to find a note on the door. It has been scrawled on the back of an old letter, the writing a childish scrawl that floats up and down the page and just about legible. The note reads:

 

_Dear Customer,_

_It is with regret I must inform you that we are unable to open today due to electrical faults. We hope to have resolved the issue in time to open tomorrow._

_Sorry for the inconvenience,_

_Jo and the bookshop team_

 

The trio look between themselves in confusion. Surely Jo would have let them know by now if they weren’t opening so they wouldn’t have had to make an unnecessary journey to the bookshop.

Just as Ryan is gearing up to barge into the shop, the doors are flung open to reveal a grinning Jo standing proudly with her hands on her hips. “Good morning, friends!” She greets them happily. “Time for a family bonding trip!” Jo turns off the lights and drags her girlfriend and colleagues down the street to her car.

As they walk down the path, the trio share glances in silent conversation.

_What is happening?_

_I don’t know!_

_Are we being kidnapped?_

_Don’t be ridiculous._

_Is there even an electrical fault?_

_Who knows!_

_Well, the lights were working._

The conversation runs until they arrive at Jo’s car. The blonde is none-the-wiser. “In we get!” Says Jo jovially. “Yaz gets to go in the front because she’s my girlfriend.” She pecks Yaz on the cheek.

Ryan clambers into the back.

Graham eyes up Jo’s bright blue Nissan Micra warily. “No way am I getting into that deathtrap.”

Yaz tries to coax him into the car and, after a little too much time spent out in the cold, Graham desists and they bundle into the car for a rather bumpy journey to the bowling alley.

Bowling as a foursome is really something to witness. Much like siblings, Yaz and Ryan are incredibly competitive with one another.

“Ready to lose, Ryan?” Yaz teases.

“Always the bark but never the bite, Yasmin Khan.” He smirks. “It’s a pity Jo chose this. I’m sure you’ve done nothing but show off so far. Now she’s going to see your lowest side.”

Yaz dismisses his comment with a huff. “I have biology on my side, pal.”

Ryan laughs. “I may have dyspraxia but at least I can lift all of the balls here. You’re weaker than anyone I know.”

“Oh yeah?” Challenges Yaz. “Let’s find out.”

“Children!” Graham intervenes. “You can argue about that in the gym with proper weights. _Not_ here with heavy balls that could break my toes.”

With a roll of their eyes, Yaz and Ryan begrudgingly stop their bickering and prepare to play.

It turns out to be a perfect trip for the four of them. Particularly for Ryan and Graham. Everyone (meaning Yaz and Jo) are kept busy and on their feet enough for them to keep their hands off each other.

To everyone’s surprise, Graham is an exceptional bowler. Yaz is exceptionally bad. Graham gets a grand total of 226, Jo gets 120, Ryan gets 81 and Yaz manages to get 66. While Ryan did not win the game, he beats Yaz by a fair margin. Unfortunately for Yaz, Ryan is not one to take such things lightly and puts it upon himself to be very loud about defeating her.

Meanwhile, Jo is quizzing Graham about his win. “I don’t think I’ve ever got close to 200! How do you do it? What’s your secret?”

“It’s just practise, boss.” Graham replies. “Me and the other bus drivers would always pop down here after a day’s work. We got pretty into it.”

“Have you ever considered joining a team?” Asks Jo.

“Nah,” Graham says. “That was just a lucky turn, I’m not good enough for that.”

Jo eyes him suspiciously. “If you say so…” Then she adds, “But there’s no harm in trying.”

Graham considers her point for a moment before he notices Yaz and Ryan getting a little too riled up. “I think you should go and save your girlfriend.” He says to Jo, nodding in Yaz’s direction.

Yaz is standing on her tiptoes, poking Ryan in his chest, looking as though she is ready to start a fight. Jo’s eyes widen and she runs over to the pair of them, sidling in between. “Hey, love, do you want a drink?” Jo asks, taking Yaz’s hand in her own and dragging her towards the bar.

“I’m alright, thank you.” Says Yaz, furrowing her brows. “Do _you_ want a drink?”

“No-” Jo falters.

“Shall we go back to our lane then?”

“Maybe…” Says Jo. “Or we could stay here for a little while. Away from the others?”

A small smile tugs at the corners of Yaz’s lips. “Okay.”

“Okay.” Jo gives Yaz a quick peck on the lips and blushes.

Jo is still not yet used to kissing Yaz in public. Yaz finds it endearing.

“I could give you some bowling tips?”

Yaz’s eyes shine.

And so, Jo proceeds to give Yaz tips and tricks - how to hold the ball and how to stand. She is in the middle of physically manoeuvring Yaz’s body when a shy young girl walks up to them hesitantly.

“Excuse me.” Says the girl quietly. Her eye contact is brief. She looks about thirteen and is wearing a top that reads ‘why be racist, sexist, homophobic or transphobic when you could just be quiet?’

“Hey.” Says Jo kindly, quieting her voice from its usual volume. “Can we help you with anything?”

“I just wanted to say it’s really nice to see you two together.” She mumbles. “It gives me hope.”

“Thank you.” Says Jo, smiling, taking Yaz’s hand in her own. “What’s your name?”

“Becca.”

“Well, Becca.” Says Jo, her eyes sparkling. “I’m glad you think so. It’s nice to see you as well. It truly is brave to be yourself and I admire anyone who does it.”

Yaz nods in agreement. “That top is amazing, by the way. Where did you get it from?”

“I just searched the caption online and it came up.”

“I’ll be ordering one when I get home.” Says Yaz.

“Me too.” Says Jo. “Also, I don’t know if you’re interested but I have a bookshop on Ecclesall Road. If you ever want to visit, you’re more than welcome to. You don’t have to buy a book - you can just pop in and say hi!”

“Thank you.” Becca replies, unable to hide the smile on her face.

“Anytime!” Chorus Yaz and Jo before they wish each other good luck in their games and bid their goodbyes.

The next game for Yaz, Jo, Ryan and Graham is not at all like the first. Granted, Graham still wins by a mile with Jo staying in second place. But Yaz beats Ryan by a long shot. This is down to Jo’s advice and definitely not because Jo _accidentally_ took Yaz’s turn more than once and then _accidentally_ put Ryan off when it was his go. However, when Ryan came to accuse Yaz of scheming with her girlfriend to recruit some much needed help, Jo is very convincing in her dissuasion tactics.  Yaz is weirdly proud of how good her girlfriend is at lying and makes a mental note to thank her for it later.

As they are so close to the cinema when they leave, and it is not yet the afternoon, they decide to stay in the area and watch a film. All of them want to see _Bad Times at the El Royale_ and so that is what they watch. It turns out to be a lot jumpier than expected and Yaz ends up almost jumping into Jo’s lap at times. But Jo doesn’t mind. It’s nice to be the person of safety for Yaz. And, while she likes to be held herself, Jo also likes it when Yaz hides in her shoulder, making it easier for her to wrap her arm around her to pull her closer to her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you for reading! i hope it was okay <3 and, as per, thank you to all of you who leave kudos and comments - you make me smile so much ! <3


	12. take care of her

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> remember last chap when i said there would be 14 chapters ??????? i already added two extras and an epilogue so this it's now up to 17. will we ever hit an end ???????? who the heck knows !!!!!!
> 
> anyway thanks to @manyfandomed for being my brilliant beta. i love you <3

Things are growing more serious between Yaz and Jo. And with this comes milestones. One of these is meeting the parents. Jo is meeting Yaz’s parents today and it is very much clear that Jo is nervous.

Jo has been nervous ever since Yaz brought up the situation. Yaz hates how much it seems to be affecting her. It’s unsettling. Her usual bouncy self has been overtaken by someone eerily calm. Her foot and finger tapping has ceased and Yaz can’t tell where Jo is at any given moment because her steady humming of made up tunes is now non-existent. This Jo is foreign to Yaz. A part of her wants to call it off but she knows that would just be delaying the inevitable. Plus, her mother would never allow it. Once she had decided she was going to meet Jo, she could not be persuaded otherwise. And every attempt at dissuasion only resulted in more details of the evening being thought through.

The drive to Park Hill is a bizarre one. Yaz drives and Jo is in charge of the music. She chooses Yaz’s favourite songs but Yaz likes them a little less when Jo isn’t making up her own lyrics.

When they park up, Yaz rests her hand on Jo’s knee to stop her getting out too quickly. “Hey.” She says softly. “You ready for this?”

Jo nods in return. 

Yaz cocks an eyebrow. “Look at me?” She says, her voice gentle. “I know you’re nervous but I want my family to meet the Jo I know best.” She gives Jo’s knee a squeeze. “Besides, they’re going to think I’m crazy if we turn up like this after I’ve talked their ears off about my amazing girlfriend who couldn’t sit still if she were superglued to a chair.”

“You talk to them about me?” A ghost of a smile passes Jo’s lips. 

“Non-stop!” Yaz nods. “I’m pretty sure they only want to meet you so they can tell me to shut up about you, because they know you and don’t need to be told about you anymore.” Yaz relaxes when she feels the familiar light tapping of Jo’s middle finger on the back of her hand.

“I love you, Yasmin Khan.”

Yaz’s heart flutters in her chest. “I love you too.”

This is the first time they have verbalised it. They’ve shown it for a while through small, meaningful acts. Locked eyes across a crowded room,thoughtful notes left in the home of the other, a wordless squeeze of the hand. Speaking it aloud just solidifies the notions. 

With Jo closer to her usual self, they step out of the car and head up to Yaz’s parents’ flat. It is Yaz who knocks on the door and her mother who answers.

“Hi, Mum.” Says Yaz, hugging her mother. “This is Jo.” She introduces her girlfriend.

“Hi, Yaz’s mum!” Jo grins, whipping out a bouquet of tulips from inside her coat.

Yaz hadn’t know she’d brought flowers and she thinks that was Jo’s intention. By the look of their slightly crumpled petals, they’d been tightly hidden away. Granted, they didn’t look the best but the thought was there and it made Yaz love Jo a little more.

“Please,” Says, Yaz’s mother, taking the flowers. “Call me Najia.”

Jo nods and pulls Najia into a hug. “Thank you for having us for tea.”

“It’s no bother. It’s nice to finally meet the woman our daughter talks our ears off about.” Najia leads them into the flat and calls to the other members of the Khan family. “HAKIM, SONYA, YAZ IS HERE WITH JO!”

A man appears from around the corner, wearing an apron. Before he can introduce himself, Najia chides him. “Take that off immediately!”

“I was going to make pakora!” He tries to defend himself.

“Not tonight, you’re not.” Says Najia, taking the apron off him and putting it on herself. “Make yourself useful and introduce yourself to Yaz’s girlfriend.”

“Hi, Jo.” He says tentatively. “I’m Hakim, Yaz’s dad.”

“Nice to meet you, Yaz’s dad!” Jo replies, pulling him into a rather awkward hug.

At that moment, a girl slinks into the room. “Not bad, Yasmin.” She says in approval. “Punching above your weight much?”

“Shut up.” Yaz turns to her girlfriend. “Jo, this is my sister, Sonya.”

Jo anticipates the lack of want for a hug this time and holds her hand out for Sonya to shake. “Pleasure to meet you, Yaz’s sister!”

Sonya takes her hand. “You too.” She says unconvincingly.

While this exchange is occurring, Najia pulls her daughter to the side. “Is she going to refer to us like that the whole evening?”

Yaz shrugs in response. 

“She’s an odd one.” Says Najia. “But she seems like her heart’s in the right place.”

“That just about sums her up.” Yaz smiles proudly before heading towards the lounge, dragging Jo with her by the hand.

“Can I help in the kitchen?” Jo offers.

Yaz’s eyes widen and she shakes her head wildly at her mum where Jo can’t see. Jo isn’t the worst cook in the world. But she certainly isn’t the best. And she definitely isn’t the tidiest. She is far from it. Yaz dreads to think what her mother’s reaction would be if she saw the mess Jo makes in the kitchen. Added to which, Yaz is still wary of Jo’s knife usage after the orange incident. All in all, it is best to keep Jo out of the kitchen. At least for now.

Acknowledging her daughter’s movements, Najia shakes her head. “It’s very kind of you to offer, but it’s alright. Make yourself at home instead.”

When they settle down to eat, everyone is more relaxed and happy to listen to Jo’s incessant talking. Her babbling had charmed Yaz and it seems to be having a similar effect on her family. Even on Sonya.

“So, where’s home for you, Jo?” Najia asks. 

“Sheffield now.” Replies Jo. “I’ve always moved around a lot - never really found a place that felt like home before. But I like it here.” 

“And your family?” Najia asks. “Where is home for them?”

A usually talkative Jo becomes tight-lipped, though not rudely so. “It’s just me, I’m afraid. Has been for a while.” She attempts a smile and appreciates Yaz’s comforting hand on her thigh under the table. 

“Well, we’re happy to invite you into ours.” Hakim nods gently. 

“Thank you.” Mumbles Jo. She locks eyes with Hakim and Najia. “Genuinely.”

“We’ll see if you’re still thanking us after spending more time here.” Najia jokes warmly and seamlessly moves the conversation on, much to Jo’s gratitude. 

The rest of the evening runs smoothly with many anecdotes shared, the Khans enamoured by Jo’s entire being, hanging onto her every word just as Yaz had done. 

Just before they leave, Jo nips to the toilet, leaving the Khans alone in the lounge. 

“We like her, Beti.” Says Hakim kindly. 

“Take care of her.” Adds Najia. 

“Aren’t you supposed to say that to her about me?” Yaz laughs. 

Najia gives her a stern look. “It sounds like she’s been through a lot, Yasmin. And she looks at you as if you’re her world. Be gentle with her.”

“I will, Ammi.” Yaz ducks her head shyly. She is pleased. This is testament to how much they like Jo. Yaz knew her family would like her but she was not expecting this level of acceptance so early. But Yaz they proved her wrong and she can feel warmth radiate from her heart. 

When Jo returns from the bathroom, they bid their goodbyes. As the door closes behind them, their little fingers intertwine. 

“I think that went alright.” Says Jo. 

“I think that went more than alright.” Replies Yaz. “They loved you!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi again, pals! just to say thank you for reading and i hope it was okay :) can you tell i love najia khan? haha
> 
> also thank you to those of you who have left kudos/comments ~ i love you all <3
> 
> (btw pls hit me up on tumblr i love it - antiopesgirlfriend)


	13. maths in my bookshop?!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey up ! sorry i have been absent. i have just had my last week of placement and oh boy was it a ride. a busy, busy ride with v little spare time. but i am here now !! 
> 
> thank you to @manyfandomed for being an absolutely amazing beta once again ~ i love you <3

While the bookshop is no longer in the hands of Helly and Sarah, Yaz still finds it a comforting place to be - home in a shop. It still has that familiar feel and she knows it is a safe place. Now her girlfriend owns it and that is just an added bonus.

Unfortunately for Graham and Ryan, Yaz still likes to spend the odd Saturday at the bookshop. When she was younger, she would spend her time tucked away doing homework or reading a book. Now she is older, and Jo is always there, she spends a little too much time tucked away in the back with Jo. If Graham walks in on them, he tries to dance around the subject, warning Ryan that Yaz and Jo are ‘getting better acquainted’. Ryan says it as it is and details to Graham which items of clothing have been misplaced and which surfaces should probably be avoided until they’ve had a good clean.

On this particular Saturday, Ryan and Graham had spent the morning dismantling a display. The cardboard which had once made it up is a lot bigger than them but still needs to be taken to the back. Instead of breaking it into smaller pieces that would be easier to carry, they take them into the back as they are, unable to see where they are going. This turns out to be a mildly regrettable choice. When they drop the cardboard to the ground, they are met with the sight of Jo backed against a shelf, her blouse half-undone with Yaz’s mouth latched onto her neck.

Graham is keen to scuttle away unnoticed but Ryan is not of the same mind. “Oi!” He calls much too loudly. “Love birds! Break it up!”

Jo tries (unsuccessfully) to jump backwards. Yaz looks to Ryan with a gaze colder than the North Sea. “Can you not.”

He shrugs carelessly. “I’m just trying to work, Yaz, but someone keeps distracting my boss.”

Yaz shuffles so the boys can’t see Jo fastening her buttons back up. “Well, you’ve got what you wanted. We’ll come back to the front.”

And that is what they do. However, in the kerfuffle of the last few minutes, they all managed to miss the jingle of the bell signalling the entrance of a customer. When they fall into view, Yaz and Jo gasp. “Becca!” They chorus.

Jo runs towards her and halts suddenly, a mere foot in front of Becca. “Are you okay with hugs?”

Upon Becca’s nod, Jo pulls her into a tight hug. “I’m so glad you came!”

“Hey.” Greets Yaz from behind Jo. She also pulls Becca into a hug before stepping back. “Look!” Yaz stretches out her t-shirt for Becca to see.

A smile tugs at the corners of Becca’s lips. Yaz is wearing the top Becca had been wearing on the day they went bowling. “I love it.” She says. The nerves Yaz and Jo originally saw from her are now non-existent. They evaporated as soon as she had stepped through the door to the bookshop. Becca has never felt more at home in a new place. “I looked your shop up online and saw you had a little cafe. Do you mind if I do my homework there?”

“Not at all!” Jo answers, ushering her towards the comfiest seat. “Make yourself at home. Can I get you anything?”

“Could I have a hot chocolate, please?”

“‘Course! Cream and marshmallows?”

“Just marshmallows please.”

Jo smiles kindly. “Atta girl. I’ll be back with it in just a moment.”

While Jo is busy making Becca’s hot chocolate, Yaz makes light conversation with Becca, starting to introduce her to everyone. She realises they asked Becca for her name at bowling but never told her their own. Plus, she hadn’t met Ryan or Graham there either. As they talk, Yaz realises how much Becca reminds her of herself. She has a feeling they will be seeing a lot more of her.

When Jo brings the drink over, she delivers it as, “A hot choc from me to you!” Becca thanks her but before she can ask for the bill, Jo shuts her down.

“It’s on the house.” Jo says with what Yaz can only imagine is an attempt at a wink. Ignoring that, they continue chatting. Apparently, Becca’s parents know she is bi and are still trying to understand it but are never short of being supportive. Home is fine, she tells them, but she also admits that she feels as though she can be herself in Jo’s bookshop without any hint of worry.

Yaz is glad that Becca’s family is accepting and that Jo’s bookshop is a safe haven for her. But when Yaz thinks of all the other things that could be unkind to Becca, her heart contracts as though it has been touched by the sharp point of a blade. She wonders if Helly and Sarah ever felt this way when she had stepped into their bookshop. It feels almost as if she is a blanket too small to cover Becca. That no matter how hard Yaz tries to completely cover her, there will always be a part of Becca exposed to the cruel cold. It is not worth thinking about, Yaz decides. Becca is strong and has people to lean on should she need them.

They leave Becca to work on her GCSE revision alone, both Yaz and Jo (each unbeknownst to the other) sliding her secret snacks and extra marshmallows. This continues until Jo catches a glimpse of the work Becca is working on. Like a cumulonimbus darkening the sky, a sullen look finds its home on Jo’s face. “Oh, no you don’t.” She says sharply. “Maths in my bookshop?! Put that away immediately.”

Becca pales and her mouth opens and closes as if she’s trying to formulate words but produces no sound.

“Jo!” Yaz yells from the other side of the bookshop. “You don’t know each other well enough for you to do that yet - she doesn’t know you’re joking!”

Relief floods over Becca’s features as she realises Jo was not being serious.

Jo apologises in excess then says to Becca, “This is your safe space. As long as it's legal, anything goes. Plus, if we’re not too busy, I can help you out. I was quite the mathematical whiz in my day.”

Becca raises a questioning eyebrow. “So if I said I was struggling with reciprocal functions, you’d be able to help me out?”

“More than that.” Jo’s eyes shine. “I’d  _ love  _ to help.” And so, between necessary work errands, Jo sits with Becca and patiently explains how to solve the problems she is struggling with.

Yaz is a little removed from the situation - she was never particularly strong in maths. From what she did know then, she cannot remember any of it now. Instead of helping with the work, she helps with fuelling the brain by continuing to sneak Becca more snacks and marshmallows when Jo isn’t looking. When Jo is there, she looks up from her copy of  _ Rose Under Fire  _ and watches her interact with Becca. Yaz is reminded - though really she could never forget - why she had fallen for Jo. The blonde seems to have endless time for others and her eyes are always bright, her presence enough to put people immediately at ease. 

When it is time for Becca to leave, they say farewell with hugs and the promise of another visit not too far in the future. 

Jo pulls Yaz into her side and Yaz rests her head on Jo’s shoulder. Jo lets her own head rest atop Yaz’s. They watch out of the windows as Becca sets off to make her way home. “I feel like we have a child already.” She says loud enough for only Yaz to hear. “Have we committed to starting a family too early?”

Yaz steps away from her girlfriend so she can gently punch her in the arm. “Don’t jump the gun too much.” She warns. “You haven’t met Helly and Sarah yet.”

“When’s that happening again?”

“Next Sunday.”

“Oh yeah!” Says Jo. Then she realises how soon that truly is. Her eyes almost fall out of her head. “Wait  _ next   _ Sunday? As in a week tomorrow?”

“The very same.”

Jo feels all of the air escape her lungs. “Oh dear God, that’s too soon.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sO i never intended to have any big original characters. but helly and sarah seem to have weaved their way into a more prominent position and becca came from nowhere but i love her so i hope this change of events is okay ! :) thank you to all of you who read, comment and leave kudos, it honestly makes my day every time i get an email. i hope this chap is up to your standards <3


	14. i think it looks like a meb

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey up gang! here is the next chapter - i hope you like helly and sarah <3
> 
> thank you @manyfandomed for being an amazing proof-reader despite me having 0 schedule in sending you what i write <3

Jo has met Yaz’s family. She made quite the impression - Najia has asked her around for tea more than once, Hakim has asked if she wants to cook with him and Sonya has even invited her on a shopping trip. Yaz can hardly believe it. Her family do more for Jo than they do for her! Not that she is complaining. They like her girlfriend. Yaz can’t remember a time when they’ve even been half as welcoming to her previous boyfriends and girlfriends. But there is still another hurdle for Jo to leap - Helly and Sarah.

The day of Jo meeting Helly and Sarah is upon them. If possible, Jo is even more nervous to meet them than she was to meet Yaz’s actual parents. She is literally bouncing off the walls. Yaz is grateful the plan is to go on a walk in the Peak District before a proper pub Sunday lunch. That way Jo can walk of her nervous energy (or at least some of it).

They meet at a place called Monsal Head. It is the location of a pub and cafe atop a hill looking over a ravine with a viaduct crossing its bottom. Yaz and Jo are standing at the hill’s edge, they fingers interlocked, admiring the view down the dale, commenting on how green everywhere looks under the bright blue sky. Their conversation is interrupted by a voice now familiar to them both.

“Well, if it isn’t the happy couple!” Helly greets them from behind.

Sarah greets them with a gentler and more simple “Hello.” But pulls both Yaz and Jo into hugs as eagerly as her wife had, almost matching Jo’s usual state of enthusiasm. Almost.

They walk down the valley as a foursome along a loose path. Helly leads, followed by Yaz, then Jo, then Sarah. The path is just about wide enough to walk in pairs but they pass so many people it is not worth the constant shifting between double and single file. By the time they reach the viaduct, Helly is telling Jo the second (of seemingly an abundance of) her memory of embarrassing tales of a younger Yaz.

“And you’ll never believe what Yaz did when she was seven!” Helly continues on from her last story.

Before cocking an eyebrow to signal to Helly she wanted to hear more, Jo looks over to Yaz. Her cheeks have a pink tinge to them. To a passing stranger, the colour could be put down to rosiness caused by the fresh air but Jo knows better. It is not usual for Yaz to be embarrassed. Jo knows she’s had plenty a chance to feel that when they’re in public together. But up and until now, Jo hasn’t seen Yaz truly feel that way. It isn’t a debilitating kind of embarrassment, though, so Jo signals to Helly to continue with her tale.

Apparently, Yaz had liked her Year 3 teacher a lot. At Christmas, she had made her a card when she was supposed to be making one for her family, though it was signed with love all the same. It had made sense to Yaz. Her family didn’t celebrate Christmas - why shouldn’t she make a card for someone who did  _ and  _ for someone whom she really liked? Then Valentine’s Day came around and her parents wouldn’t let her buy her teacher flowers. When Yaz had complained of this to Helly and Sarah, they suggested she pick some flowers on her own. Yaz’s teacher ended up with more snowdrops than she could hold with both hands. When it came to her birthday, Yaz made her a cake and gave her a book as well as a handmade card. Two weeks later brought around Yaz’s eighth birthday. She received no gift from her teacher and she was inconsolable. Only through the use of books and hot chocolate could Helly and Sarah help her to get over her first unrequited crush.

After a little more teasing of Yaz, the conversation flows naturally onto the bookshop. It is doing well, the small cafe doing nothing but help the business stay afloat. Jo invites Helly and Sarah to visit whenever they can next. They accept her invite graciously and promise they will pop in the next time they come to Sheffield.

“You might get to meet Becca!” Says Yaz.

Helly and Sarah share a confused glance.

“Who is Becca?” Asks Sarah.

“She comes into the shop sometimes.” Explains Yaz. “Sometimes she buys a book, sometimes she reads, sometimes she does her homework. Just like I used to do with you two.” Yaz smiles shyly.

“She’s a good kid.” Adds Jo. “Saw us together when we went bowling with Ryan and Graham.”

Once more, Helly and Sarah share a look. This time, it is a knowing look. They would never let Yaz know this but they had needed her just as much as she had needed them. Before Yaz had come into their lives, they were going through a rough patch. More than anything, they had wanted to have their own child but luck was not on their side. They had both been through the rounds of IVF the NHS could provide, but neither had managed to get pregnant. It broke their hearts; they were distraught. And then Yaz had walked into their bookshop, her toothless grin a beacon of light in both of their lives. They did not take over parenting duties from Najia and Hakim but they cherished every moment they spent with Yaz. And they were always available to babysit. Though Yaz and Jo are not trying to have a child, Helly and Sarah can see that Becca is only bringing them closer together. It reminds them of themselves in their youth and they share a smile.

“We’d love to meet her.” Says Sarah.

“A chance for another Yaz in the world? We wouldn’t miss it.” Says Helly.

The group walk to Bakewell and back, getting off the old railway tracks before the long tunnel so they can stop for lunch. After crossing a field and a country road, they find themselves at a proper country pub. They step into The Packhorse, chuckling at the sign on the door with reads ‘Shut the bloody door!’. It certainly gets the point across. The interior of the pub is more welcoming than the sign - It warms you both inside and out. Log fires and local beers put a glow on the faces of the customers. The smoke and smell of food mix together to form a scent that makes you instantly relax.

A friendly waiter shows them to their table - a window bench at one end with seats dotted around the other sides of the table, just far away enough from the fire to be warm but not roasting.

At the mere sight of the window seat, Jo’s eyes widen, the twinkle in them uncontainable. To Yaz’s surprise, Jo does not immediately leap to get her place on it. Instead, she offers it to Helly and Sarah. They decline, however, as they can see how much Jo really wants to sit there. 

They order their food at the bar from the large chalkboards which line the walls. As they wait for their lunch, the conversation turns to work as it often does.

“You must worry about Yaz.” Says Sarah to Jo, not unkindly. “Her job isn’t safe like ours.”

This is something Jo had never considered before. She had only imagined Yaz being heroic, locking up criminals who had stolen an innocent old lady’s handbag. And, if she was being honest, she had also thought about Yaz bringing home a pair of handcuffs. Obviously a different pair to the ones she used to arrest people. 

“Oh, yeah.” Says Helly. “Remember the time Yaz was given a black eye in that drunken brawl? Her face was a funny colour for weeks! Then there was the time she was caught in the middle of a fight involving knives. Thank goodness you wear those vests, Yaz. I don’t know why Najia even let you join the force in the first place.”

Jo sits in the middle of the conversation, her mind unable to focus on Helly’s words as she continues talking. Images pass through her mind of Yaz being harmed and she is unable to stop them. But then Yaz speaks up and her voice, paired with the subtle linking of their little fingers under the table grounds her.

“You’re exaggerating, I wouldn’t be allowed on a job that unsafe. I’m still here, aren’t I?” Seeing that her last comment didn’t do much to calm Jo, Yaz tells a little white lie and tells herself the notion is harmless if it eases Jo. “Besides, each week I’m assigned more and more desk duty. Soon I won’t be on the beat at all!” Her small false declaration results in the reappearance of Jo’s smile. It relieves her but she feels guilt heavy in her chest. Thankfully, the food arrives and with it comes a welcome change of subject.

Towards the end of their meal, Jo is hugely distracted. Her usual constant nattering is replaced by the odd hum of approval. It is Yaz who notices her absence from the conversation. “You okay?” Yaz says to Jo.

“Never better, love.” Jo replies, her tone airy and inattentive.

“Jo.” Says Yaz sharply to get her attention properly. “What are you thinking about?”

“What that dog is called.” Replies Jo, nodding towards an alsatian puppy with one ear flopped over its eye. “I think it looks like a Meb but I’m not quite sure.”

Yaz is about to launch into a spiel about how it is impossible to tell what a dog is called based on its appearance but Sarah speaks first. “I think you’re right.”

“No.” Say Yaz and Helly firmly. They look to each other, a specific kind of apprehension in their eyes. Both of them love and support their partners but this is not something they can stand by and let happen. Especially over a name like  _ Meb _ . Before the conversation can even begin to progress any more, Helly orders the bill, pays for the meal and stands up so they can all return to their cars and go their separate ways, leaving the dog name conversation behind them. Their fuss in leaving, however, disturbs the puppy and it begins to yap. 

The owners try to calm it, talking gently but loud enough for Yaz, Jo, Helly and Sarah to hear. “Shh, it’s okay. Lie down.” The puppy does not calm and they make their commands more stern. “Down, Meb.  _ Down. _ ”

Even though Jo and Sarah are halfway out of the door, they still hear the puppy’s name. Identical ear-splitting grins take over their faces as they triumphantly high-five. 

Yaz and Helly cannot believe their ears. They silently decide it will be best for everyone involved if they keep their partners’ secret skill completely secret from any other human being from now until forever. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ahhhh i hope this was okay ! thank you very kindly for reading and for leaving comments and kudos - it means an awful lot <3 you guys never fail to make me smile


	15. they will both end up in the water

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> on the wind-down now, pals. just to let you know, this is a two-parter
> 
> thank you to @manyfandomed for beta-ing again. you are a star <3

Yaz has a rare Friday off work. At the weekend, there is the local derby at Bramall Lane. She is scheduled to work it so she is not expected to go in on the Friday before. To her, it seems like a fair deal. To Jo, it does not. To the surprise of no-one, Jo is not a football fan. But she has heard what avid football fans can be like and, especially since her conversation with Helly and Sarah, she really does not want Yaz to be controlling any that start getting rowdy. So, she decides she will have a nice day with her before anything can go wrong. Jo puts her fool-proof plan in place once more - a scrawled note on the door of the bookshop to apologise for not opening due to electrical faults - and takes Yaz, Ryan and Graham on another family trip.

Once more, Graham is less than keen to get into Jo’s rickety car. However, he gets in with less complaining than last time and they set off. For this trip, Jo drives them away from the city centre and into the countryside of the Peak District. Jo does not tell them where they are heading but the signs (all directing them to Chatsworth) give her away. When they drive past Edensor, it is very much clear that Chatsworth is their destination for the day.

As Jo drives over the bridge and the stately home gets ever closer, Jo announces that she is treating them to a day in the gardens and that she has a picnic packed in her bag for when they get peckish. The trio thank her graciously.

“I’ll get your ticket, Jo.” Says Graham. His tone is firm and Jo knows this is not a time to argue. “While we do have two here who act like children,” He nods between Yaz and Ryan. “We’ll not be able to get a family ticket so it’ll cost you an arm and a leg for all four of us.”

Yaz and Ryan try to protest but give up trying quickly. As much of a child Jo is, they act more like young siblings. They will only lose their side of the argument.

They all enter the gardens at the top entrance, popping into the gradient greenhouses. They head towards the kitchen garden and the house properly comes into view, the gold paint lining the window panes glistening in the spring sun.

“Wow.” Breathes Graham. “It’s just like in Pride and Prejudice.”

Yaz and Ryan catch each other’s eye and sigh.

Jo whips her head around to face Graham. “I didn’t think you’d be into that, Graham.”

The man shrugs. “I’m full of surprises, me. I love all things like that. Pride and Prejudice, Call the Midwife, Little Women and so on. You name it, I’ve seen it.” He admires the grand building and speaks softly. “Grace would have loved this.”

The other three stand quietly and patiently, letting Graham have his moment. When he is ready, they advance, making their way through the kitchen garden towards the top of the cascade. It is quite the garden feature. A centuries-old cascade, gushing with the water of four lakes. Fountains at the top cause the pond to overflow, allowing the excess water to ribbon down the steps, each a little waterfall in itself.

Its effect on Jo is completely unsurprising. Her childish nature is attracted to the flowing water like an opposing magnetic pole. The pull towards it in her chest is undeniable and she is unstoppable in her quest to paddle in the water. Jo sprints down to the bottom, Yaz trying desperately to stay on her heels. Ryan and Graham follow at their own speed. They meet the couple about halfway down the water feature. Jo is walking up the cascade, scuffed light up trainers balancing on on hand, Yaz’s arm balancing her with the other, her trousers rolled halfway up her calves. Yaz is walking on the solid ground, mouthing silent prayers hoping that Jo will not slip because if that happens, they will both end up in the water.

“You know, I think we should get all of the water activities sorted first.” Babbles Jo. “To give us time to dry off before the picnic and before we get back into the car so we don’t make it all soggy.”

“There are more water activities?” Asks Yaz dubiously as Graham mutters something about there not being anything that could make Jo’s car worse than it already is.

“Oh yes!” Jo nods dramatically, bright eyes widening as her foot slips on the somewhat slimy rock beneath her. Once Yaz steadies her with a strong arm, Jo continues. “There’s a weeping willow just up from here. Not weeping in the traditional sense, of course. It is a sculpture of a tree which spurts water out of its branches. Very clever if you ask me!”

“I see.” Yaz says hesitantly. “Do we all have to go under?”

“Not at all!” Jo shakes her head, once again causing her to lose her balance.

Yaz grabs Jo’s arm tightly, scared she will leave a bruise but glad her girlfriend remains upright.

“If you don’t mind, boss.” Says Graham. “I might opt out of this sodding crying tree stuff.”

“Me too.” Adds Ryan. “It might be sunny but it’s not very warm and I don’t really want to get ill.”

Yaz is about to add her excuse for not taking part when she notices Jo’s head is hanging slightly lower than normal and the usual sparkle in her eye couldn’t even be described as a glimmer now. “I’m keen.” She says instead. “I’ll race you around it.” Yaz adds, hoping that the anticipation for a race will overwhelm the fact that she wants to do it as much as quickly as possible so she can remain as dry as possible.

It does. The glint in Jo’s eye is once more comparable to a galaxy in the night sky. “Let’s do it.” Jo leaps out of the water and immediately starts to put on her light up shoes and normal (but unpaired) socks.

Ryan looks on in disgust, cringing at the thought of having soggy socks and shoes for the rest of the day. He shakes his head but says nothing. He has learnt that Jo has her own quirks and there is no use in trying to change them. When Jo’s shoes are on, Ryan walking in a line with his friends down to the weeping willow. He decides to not comment on Yaz and Jo’s linked little fingers. As much as he likes to tease his best friend for her relationship with his boss, he is beyond pleased that she has met someone who can make her this happy.

By the time they reach the weeping willow, Jo’s joy has infected Yaz and her smile is just as big as the blonde’s. Graham agrees to judge the race after Ryan point-blank refuses. And so, Graham checks that the couple are starting in line before he announces the commencement of the race.

Yaz opts for the tightest circle. It is likely the wettest route but it is also, in theory, the quickest as it is the shortest. But what she fails to account for is Jo’s immense speed. Jo runs the lap of the tree far faster than Yaz could have ever imagined.

Back at Ryan and Graham’s side, Yaz is breathless while Jo doesn’t look like she even knows the meaning of the word.

“How?” Questions Yaz, amazed.

“The need for speed called, Yasmin Khan. And I answered.” Jo smirks, stepping closer to Yaz. “I think I deserve my prize now.”

Ryan and Graham realise what is about to occur and step back, averting their eyes. 

“Your  _ what _ ?” Counters Yaz.

“My prize.” Repeats Jo. Taking Yaz by the open sides of her shirt, Jo pulls Yaz into the sprinkling water and kisses her.

While Yaz enjoys the kiss, she does not enjoy how damp she is getting so pulls back from Jo and drags her back into the dryness, laughing. “Congrats on your win, Jo. I’ll not let you have it so easy in the future.”

Jo shrugs. “Say what you will, but you will never be faster than me.”

The foursome make their way around the rest of the garden, through the rockery and around the various lakes and ponds. Their trip down the coal tunnel brings issues as soon as they reach the bottom of the steel steps and enter the dimly-lit passage. Graham goes in first, setting the pace. He is then followed by Ryan, then Yaz, then Jo.

The floor of the coal tunnel is not visible for two reasons. Firstly for the low lighting. Secondly for the several inches of water lining the bottom. It is the latter that causes Jo to squeal in shock, jumping back in fear. Her reaction is perfectly rational, she insists, because the water level threatens to make her light-up trainers light up no more. This scenario would be a complete and utter travesty as, she explains, it is harder than you would think to purchase light-up shoes for adults. Yaz, Ryan and Graham hadn’t even questioned it being any other way.

Jo is not a quitter, though. And so, she employs her  _ knight in shining armour  _ (Yaz) to give her a piggyback ride to the other side. Jo is not subtle either. And so, she promises Yaz that she will make her efforts well worth her time. This may not have been so bad if she hadn’t said it in such a sultry tone and at a volume impossible for Ryan and Graham to ignore. Yaz is very much aware that such declarations are not the kind of thing the boys want to hear from their boss. She is thankful to the dim lighting for hiding the blush spreading from her cheeks to her ears and neck.

This moment is not brought up again and it is largely forgotten when they spend almost an hour trying to navigate the maze only to be told they’d entered at the wrong entrance.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i hope this was okay! thank you all, i appreciate each and every one of you <3
> 
> ps. i have finished writing this now - the uploads and final proof-read is all i need to do for this fic now. but i love writing thasmin and i want to keep it up with some one shots while my life is busy (then move onto another longer fic when i am free from the uni work). so if you have any one shot ideas for thasmin and/or jo and yaz pls send them to me on tumblr (antiopesgirlfriend) bc i would love to write more for these characters <3


	16. would you mind keeping your personal business personal?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi gang ! we're back :D
> 
> thanks to @manyfandomed ~ i am indebted to you
> 
> before we start, this isn't a Fun chapter n there will be some homophobia in here ~ just wanted to warn you in case you want to avoid that kind of thing <3

After covering as much of the 105-acre garden as they can, the foursome settle by the cascade, ravenous for their picnic. They eat in silence, occupied by their need to satisfy their empty stomachs.

They stick out against the other families like a sore thumb. To begin with, everyone has young children and older grandparents with them. Our foursome have three fully-grown eternal children and a grumpy grandfather figure. While they aren’t too different to the others from the perspective of roles, they are in every other way. They’re an odd collection of people but they love each other. Biologically they may not be a family, but they are in spirit and that is what matters.

Once they finish their meal, Jo is still hungry and something has caught her eye. Ice-creams. Huge ones. To say they are as big as the average adult’s head would be a slight exaggeration but not by much. Yaz agrees to share one with Jo and the pair leave Ryan and Graham to get it from a tiny mobile kiosk based at the bottom of the cascade.

Since Jo paid for their visit, Yaz insists on paying for the ice-cream. She lets Jo have the first lick and the blonde manages to get some on her nose. Before Yaz can tell her, Jo kisses her on the cheek and thanks her for the ice-cream, leaving a trace of it on Yaz’s cheek. Yaz laughs, wiping the substance from her cheek.

“Excuse me.” Says a disgusted voice. “Would you mind keeping your personal business personal?”

Yaz and Jo turn to see a tall, broad, bald man standing behind them. He is wearing a wrinkled white t-shirt with  St. George’s Cross plastered down its middle. An unfazed toddler stands behind him.

“Excuse me?” Echoes Yaz, squaring her shoulders.

“I said would you mind keeping your  _ personal  _ business  _ personal _ .” He waggles his right index finger between Yaz and Jo. “I don’t need to see you together and my son certainly doesn’t.”

Yaz takes another step towards him. She notices that Jo is frozen behind her and it only fuels her further. No-one can do that to her girlfriend and get away with it. “Would  _ you _ mind minding your own business?” The man towers over her but Yaz’s confidence is unprecedented.

“It becomes my business when you do  _ that  _ in front of my child.” He argues, puffing out his chest. “Kissing each other on the cheek just now. And don’t think I didn’t see you stick your tongues down each other’s throats at the weeping willow. It ruins a nice day out.”

“Well, if I cared enough about your thoughts and feelings, I’d say you ruined ours.” Retorts Yaz. “But I don’t. So you haven’t.”

The man grows red in the face. “You’re being so rude.” He reaches for his phone. “I’m going to complain. What are your details?”

Yaz plays along, fumbling in her pockets to find her wallet. She flashes her police badge, pretending to find her ID. The man awkwardly clears his throat and steps back, blindly feeling for his son’s hand.

“That’s what I thought.” Yaz says as he walks away. She turns to her girlfriend who is now shaking, the ice-cream dropped on the floor. Yaz swallows down the fierce urge to hug Jo. Displaying any kind of affection is only going to hurt her further. “Hey.” She says gently. “Do you want another one?”

Jo shakes her head, a blank look on her face.

“Do you want to go home?”

Jo nods, her expression unchanging.

Yaz sends a subtle text to Ryan, hoping it makes sense as she types it out without looking at the screen.

Ryan manages to decipher her message and warns Graham. When Yaz and Jo return, they pack up their picnic and head back to the car. The journey home is much the same - the tension in the air feels as though it could be cut by a knife. The only words spoken are those by Ryan and Graham thanking Jo for the day and lift home. 

For Yaz and Jo, the evening is spent in Jo’s bed, the laptop playing familiar episodes of Brooklyn Nine Nine used as an attempt to ease Jo into a more secure place. She lies tightly tucked into Yaz’s side, her head resting on Yaz’s chest. This position makes her feel physically safe but the comments made by the man at Chatsworth play on a loop in her mind. Whenever she closes her eyes, she can see him looming over her. Jo buries herself further into Yaz’s side.

Yaz feels powerless. She wants to do everything she can to protect Jo. Every fibre of her being wants to storm into her inspector’s office at Snig Hill and demand he investigate the big, bald bully and make him feel truly sorry for his actions. But any action along those lines would be fruitless. Not to mention Hallamshire police are duty-bound to their region and Derbyshire lies outside of this.

In her heart, Yaz knows that just being close to Jo like this will help more than anything - she is present to defend Jo and keep her safe. But it doesn’t feel like she’s doing enough. It doesn’t feel like she  _ did  _ enough. Yaz is in the police. Her job is built on keeping her community safe. Yaz has poured countless hours into becoming eligible to join the force, more into training, and even more than that into it now it is her job. But she can’t even protect those closest to her when it matters most. Yaz begins to doubt if she’s ever even been a good police officer.

“I’m sorry.” Jo mumbles.

“What for?” Asks Yaz softly.

“I just froze.” Says Jo, willing her voice to not betray her and crack. “I wanted to be able to protect you but I couldn’t  _ move _ . I couldn’t even  _ talk _ .” A tear falls from her eye as her voice cracks on the last word.

Using the soft pad of her thumb, Yaz wipes away the tear. “We all freeze. That’s been a large part of my police training.” Says Yaz. “Not freezing was a personal target for me because most of the people I have to deal with on the job are bigger and stronger than me. I didn’t freeze today because I have to stand up to people like that every day. But I have frozen in the past. And I will freeze in the future. There is a numbness that takes over you and it cannot be controlled so do not feel guilty about any of today.” Yaz presses a light kiss to the crown of Jo’s head.

“Numbness always has been a strange sister to pain.”

“Even with a cloudy head, you’re the wisest person I know.” Yaz’s smile is audible. “Just focus on when you beat me in the race instead. Or when you forced me to carry you through the coal tunnel.”

Jo nods slowly. “That was pretty good.” She cranes her neck so she can see Yaz properly “Which reminds me, I owe you for the coal tunnel.” Her voice is deep and breathy.

Yaz gulps. She can feel her eyes darken as Jo shifts so she’s straddling her but Yaz does not engage. She wants to check if Jo is okay first. “Are you sure?” Yaz asks. “It’s been quite the day and I’d understand if you just wanted to relax.”

“I’ve never been more sure of anything.” Jo replies honestly. 

It’s enough to bring back that all too familiar pull in the pit of Yaz’s stomach. She knots her fist in Jo’s hair and captures her lips with her own. It feels clumsy; hands misplaced and a few too many teeth involved. Neither stop, though. They both know how much they need the other. The only hint of a pause they experience is when they break the kiss for a split-second so they can breathe before resuming. There is an urgency to it. Not in the way that they need to hurry everything up but in the way they need to feel the other closer to them. Their bodies are flush against each other, their thoughts aligned and their souls grow more intertwined by the minute. It is almost as if one would float away without the other. They ground each other. Neither of them have needed anyone this much before. Each movement is closely followed by a vocal affirmation of love. They don’t stop until the sky turns pale.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i hope your views of chatsworth haven't been tainted ! it is a lovely place n i have never had an issue there before. all of you mean a lot to me ~ thank you for reading/commenting/kudosing <3


	17. are you okay with the book club continuing?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> just a few things before we start:  
> \- we go back to book talk. i do not spoil the happenings of the book (i just discuss points from the blub and the themes pulled from this)  
> \- this is the penultimate chapter to this fic BUT it is the last proper chapter ~ the next one is hella short and a lil round off  
> \- thank you for the second to last time to @manyfandomed for all of your help. you are much appreciated <3

After the run-in at Chatsworth, several things happen. One of these is Yaz takes Jo back to the gardens for a date without Ryan and Graham. Jo is apprehensive but Yaz is more persuasive. It wouldn’t be right to let one man taint Jo’s image of a wonderful place. Yaz insists it is best to visit while the memories are fresh. Otherwise, Jo would become less and less inclined to visit at a later date. Jo listens to Yaz and is thankful for the push in the right direction. Together, they make much happier memories. Jo beats Yaz by a mile once more in the rematch of their race around the weeping willow tree. Yaz gives Jo another piggyback through the coal tunnel even though she isn’t wearing her light-up trainers this time. They are thankful that neither of them are taller than they are because their heads are close enough to the low ceiling as it is. Then it is ice-cream time. They have one each - a much better scenario than the shared ice-cream they had tried for last time. It fills them up for the rest of the day. Or, at least until Jo suggests they make peanut butter cookies that evening and eats enough batter to halve the number of cookies they can make.

The other thing that the Chatsworth incident causes is an increase in Jo’s interest in books of the self-care genre. In the book club alone, she and Yaz read  _ The Life-Changing Magic of Not Giving a F*ck, Ice-Cream for Breakfast  _ (a book about rediscovering your inner child which Yaz thinks is completely unnecessary for Jo) and  _ Eat Sweat Play.  _ The latter results in Jo trying to convince Yaz to go on many a run and to partake in a multitude of sports. In Yaz’s eyes, one of the only good things to come from this is Jo’s purchase of a trampoline which is assembled with much excitement in their (once Jo’s, now their shared) back garden. 

Jo passes on some wise words once uttered by an aunt when she was a child. “You cannot be sad if you spend ten minutes on a trampoline every day.”

This logic is highly flawed for a multitude of reasons but Yaz does not share these with Jo. She is sure she is aware of them anyway. Besides, every time Jo drags her onto the trampoline, Yaz can’t help but marvel at the unadulterated joy it brings them. Physical exercise  _ should  _ be something done for yourself - to bring fun, happiness and an ease to clear thinking. While jumping around on a trampoline is considered more messing around than exercising, it still causes the same full-body aching the next day as a hardcore workout. Messing around on the trampoline makes Yaz feel great. And this is how Jo helps her to rekindle her relationship with exercise. This time, though, it is based on feeling great rather than looking great and, Yaz realises, this is a lot more powerful.

Now the book club meetings begin fifteen minutes later to allow for Yaz to cycle there from work. By the time she arrives at the bookshop, she is a little sweaty but all the cobwebs from the working day have been blown away and she is high on endorphins. It turns out that the combination leads to much better conversation in the book club as well as a much more confident Yaz in every aspect of her life. Including the bedroom. Jo has never been more pleased with her own choice of book.

Today’s book club meeting is kickstarted with a quick kiss as Yaz enters Jo’s bookshop. As usual, a hot chocolate (marshmallows, no cream) waits for her on their normal table. When they sit down, they talk of their days at work. Jo’s days are often the same. Yaz’s days are not.

“How was today?” Asks Jo.

After their run-in at Chatsworth, Yaz’s guilt from lying about the safety of her job kept growing. She made a promise to herself to be honest with Jo about it. That doesn’t mean she’s always serious about it, though. “I’ve got a nice bruise on my ribs but you should see the other guy!” She jokes when Jo asks her about the day’s arrests. After a sharp look from Jo, Yaz gives in. “It’s fine, it was all taken care of. We have a duty to protect civilians and putting ourselves in danger does not do that. All is okay, I promise.”

Jo visibly relaxes.

“Can I put something out for discussion?” Yaz asks before they can start their talks of that fortnight’s book.

“The floor is yours, my love.” Jo nods.

Yaz takes a breath before speaking. “Are you okay with the book club continuing?” She asks. “I only say it because it can’t be the best use of your time or the most profitable. You have lots to do around the shop that this stops. Plus, I’m the only person who comes. An extra hot chocolate and book paid for aren’t exactly going to help business. Especially because this could easily be done at home whenever.”

A soft smile graces Jo’s face. “Oh, Yasmin Khan. You are ever so thoughtful.” She leans across to gently pat Yaz’s knee. “But I would like to continue with this. You underestimate the power of being able to relax in your workplace. You are the only person who comes because  _ I  _ took down posters because  _ I  _ was selfish and wanted to spend more time with you. That has not changed despite the fact that I see you every day as soon as I wake up and before I go to sleep. There is no need to worry about the business - it’s doing better than it ever has before and it only continues to grow. I prefer doing it here than at home because it provides the illusion of a schedule, something which is very important in life.”

Relief floods Yaz’s features, the ripple of its effects visible as she relaxes into her chair. “If you’re sure?”

“Sure as steel.” Jo grins. “Now, shall we commence the book talk?”

“That’s what we’re here for.” Yaz replies, getting her copy of  _ A House Without Windows  _ out of her bag.

They briefly go over the happenings of the book, making sure they have both read Nadia Hashimi’s novel in the same way. Their main points are the same - an Afghan mother and wife, Zeba’s life is turned upside-down when she finds her husband brutally murdered in their courtyard. Her family insist her innocence as she is jailed while her husband’s family vows her guilt. But, like all other women in her prison, her word holds half the value of a man’s family whether he is dead or alive.

Yaz and Jo talk of the unbalanced belief of man and woman’s word. How, wherever you are (to some extent), many men get away with telling women they smell like smoke when there isn’t even a spark of fire. They are glad to be in a position where their telling of truth can be taken as proof but are angered by the things in their life that are uncontrollable yet detriment the value of their word - their gender, their sexuality, Yaz’s race. 

“I enjoyed the book.” Says Jo. “It’s quiet but it doesn’t shy away from the horrors of the truth.”

Yaz agrees and they go into more detail about z _ ina _ and how they are unable to imagine how different their lives would be if this were their reality. Both of them appreciate the book - its dark honesty and the tales of the women it tells. It gives them a chance to step into the shoes of a life so different to their own and brings light to struggles they would otherwise be unaware of. 

_ A House Without Windows _ is by no means a light read, and both Yaz and Jo feel heavy after just speaking about it. Yaz decides she will lighten the air by sharing something with Jo before they leave to go home. “I know the point of a book club is to discuss books we have already read but I have something that is not a book for you to read here.”

Jo watches Yaz with curious eyes as she digs around in her bag to find what she is looking for. From it, she pulls out a slightly crumpled envelope. Yaz passes it to Jo and Jo holds it in her hands, brows furrowed. “But it’s addressed to you.” She says, holding it out towards Yaz.

“I know.” Says Yaz. “But I would like you to read it.” She pushes Jo’s hands back towards her. “Just read it, please.”

Complying, Jo turns the envelope over and the return address causes an eyebrow to rise. “Newcastle.” She comments. “It’s from Helly and Sarah?”

Yaz nods. “Whenever we have something important to share, we tend to write to each other. That way we get the letter as a little keepsake.”

“Is it good news?” Jo asks.

Yaz rolls her eyes playfully and sighs. “Just open it, Jo.”

Jo does. And as she reads it, her eyes brim with tears.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you ever so much for reading this <3 thank you to those of you leaving comments/kudos also ~ you brighten my day. the last chapter should go up on monday so i will see you then <3
> 
> ps. i fully recommend all of nadia hashimi's books


	18. dear yasmin

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> here we go lads. the last update of all ~ i hope it is okay <3
> 
> thank you for the last time to @manyfandomed for being an amazing beta for this entire thing

_ Dear Yasmin, _

_ As we are all well aware by now, a letter is a sign of news. However, contrary to the popular statement ‘no news is good news’, we write to you with the best kind of news. _

_ We do not think you know this, though we are sure you must have wondered why we have no children of our own, but we were under the impression that neither of us were able to carry children ourselves. Our move further north prompted us to have one more go at it - we had enough money saved to try once more as we could not have any more attempts on the NHS. It is with our greatest delight that we tell you our final effort was successful! We have enclosed a copy of our latest scan so you can see our beautiful baby boy growing in Sarah’s stomach. _

_ When we visited you and Jo at Monsal Head not long ago, it took such strength to not tell you of our news. You see, we had not yet met the all-important twelve-week mark. After several complications in our previous tries, we decided we would not tell anyone of our news until we’d had the twelve-week scan. Even then, it was just our parents who we told. Now, though, we are further into Sarah’s pregnancy and you are the next person to know. _

_ Once you have read the entirety of this letter, please feel free to share the good news (the scan and this letter itself) with Jo. _

_ That being said, we have a favour to ask you. You have been a huge part of our lives for almost two decades now. We would love for you to remain as such. Therefore, we ask you to be our child’s Godmother. You have grown up to be such a strong young woman and we would be proud to have you for him to look up to. Please let us know if you would honour us in this as soon as possible - writing is lovely and sentimental but it doesn’t half increase the anxieties caused by time. _

_ We have one last request before we sign this letter off - please extend the offer of Godmother to Jo too. We know we have only met her once but it only supported how highly you speak of her. And we trust you to the end of the world and back. _

_ Please write soon, _

_ Helly and Sarah x _   
  
  


Jo’s eyes flicker between the letter and Yaz’s face. “Can I see?” She gestures towards the scan.

Yaz passes it to Jo and a smile tugs at the corner of her lips as a tear rolls down Jo’s cheek. “So what do you think?” Asks Yaz. “Fancy the job?”

“Job?!” Jo’s eyes snap from the scan to meet Yaz’s. “The word ‘job’ implies I would find it a chore of sorts.” Jo gulps, trying to hold back more tears from falling. “I would love to be his Godmother.” Jo jumps up and pulls Yaz into a tight hug. “This is the best news ever!”

Yaz emerges from the hug, tear tracks on her cheeks giving away her emotions. “You’re telling me!” She sniffs. “Do you want to head home to write the reply?”

“Yes.” Jo answers without hesitation. “Please leave your bike here so we can drive and get home as soon as possible.”

“Okay.” Yaz chuckles, tucking her bike out of sight from the shop windows. She returns to Jo’s side, linking their little fingers. “Ready to head home?”

“The readiest.” Replies Jo. “I can’t wait to accept our roles of Mother  _ and  _ God.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> well, that is it pals. thank you to each and every one of you for reading this ~ it has actually meant so much to me <3

**Author's Note:**

> as per, thank you very much for reading <3 i appreciate each and every one of you


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